WRITE NOW

Exploring our new region

2011-08-29T10:52:00.000-07:00

Life has been good, if not slow, since we moved to New Hampshire. I spend far less time cleaning up after my kids because all of the messes they make in the backyard bother me far less than they did in closed quarters. I feel like we have unleashed our formerly caged kids into the great wide open and they just love it. They play in our backyard most all of everyday. Sometimes clothed, sometimes not. Whatever. Live free or die right? It is the New Hampshire way.

So this past week, we took a mandatory vacation while Adam's office closed. We went up to Acadia National Park in Maine and it was absolutely spectacular. The boys loved it. I loved it. We camped for two nights and stayed in a hotel (acting as a stink and decent night's sleep buffer) in between. I am not a huge fan of campground camping but I would go back to this one again just to pick the wild blueberries again! It was amazing. I picked for about an hour and this is what I came home with. I know it doesn't look like much but I was pretty proud. And for a moment, as I looked up and out over the hills and ocean to check on my kids--Eli hunting in the bushes with a stick and Tate sitting smack down in the bush, blue faced snacking on dirt and blueberries--I was in heaven. Often I have thought that I would have been a terrific pioneer wife and homesteader. And I totally felt like one letting my boys roam the Earth, not caring one bit they they smelled like campfire and dirt and were just plain downright disgusting and dirty, whilst I was gathering food straight off the ground.

So we brought home the blueberries and a giant LIVE lobster we lovingly named Pinchy. Pinchy and Duane rode in the back together. It is too bad that only one of our "pets" lived to see the next day. Needless to say, we (by we, I mean Adam...I couldn't watch) cooked and consumed our first lobster. It was pretty good but I later learned we chose one that was too big; the sweet, tender and juicy ones are apparently 2 lbs or less.

Anyway, things are good. Adam is loving his job and just picked up another day working at a state prison, which he is ecstatic about. Pulling teeth and mingling with convicts--brushing up on all of the information he has learned from watching "Gangland"--what is not to love? Our house still has not sold. Which is beyond frustrating and bad and all that. But what do you do? Keep trying and quit whining I guess. The best news is that Tate and I get to go to Indiana to see my sister Chelsea and her family. Wahoo! We, how do I put this...well, we both need a break from a certain 4 year old who lives in this house. Don't get us wrong, we love him. But...we just need a break. So to Indiana we go.

Hello blog, it's me Ashley

2011-07-11T12:01:00.000-07:00

I am not going to go into the many reasons why I am a defunct blogger; the short of it centers on my house, kids and trying to short sell my house. Enough.

And though I tried to avoid it, this blog is my neglected journal. So an update is in order I suppose. We have had a crazy and wonderful 6 months. Here are the highlights:
-Adam graduated from the Loma Linda school of Dentistry on Sunday May 29th. The ceremony wasn't nearly as hot or long as we anticipated, my shoes were cuter than any I have ever owned (too bad I probably won't ever find another reason to wear them) and everything was perfect. Both of our parents came for the event and we had a wonderful time chatting, eating and quietly celebrating the accomplishments of the one we all adore so much. I made some pretty outstanding food, I have to note: Gorgonzola crusted beef tenderloin, rosemary rolls, sweet potato fries and carrot cake.
-After that decadent event, my parents whom I cannot thank enough took our boys to Utah so we could pack up the house. The house is so riddled with mixed emotions for me. It is where I have raised my crazy boys. I love that house. It was hard to say goodbye, but only for a moment. We did it and we moved out and on. But I miss these and other people so so much. Good friends make your location your home. I am still working on making this new place a place where friends make me feel at home--even more for my kids than for me.
-And then Adam and I went to Maui! Maui is something for which I cannot thank my inlaws enough. What a gift. They watched our boys and sent us on their dime to Maui for 5 wonderful days. We went on a helicopter ride, rented a Harley and went to the top of the volcano, ate more decadent food and devoured our favorite books in prisine, beach bliss. So so fun. This event must be repeated.

-Then Adam officially became a New Hampshirian and a working man while the boys and I enjoyed some more time in Utah and at our favorite locale--the Ranch in Atlanta, ID.

So so fun and a good way to say farewell, bite the bullet and actually move ourselves 3000 miles away.

Whew. That was a little rough. But we are getting the hang of it. Fortunately, a week after we moved in, Olivia and her family came and visited for the 4th of July. I could have holed up in my house for weeks, just putting stuff away and convincing myself that I had neither the time nor the inclination to go anywhere and explore. But go and explore we did: We went to Boston on the 4th and then spent the next 5 days entertaining our kids at the farm, local ice cream shops, lake, beach and pool. They had so much fun...maybe a little too much fun. Maybe non-stop entertainment is NOT the best thing for kids??? They loved playing all day and it was so fun to have familiar faces here. When Olivia left, she said, "I think you live in a really cool place." And that has really helped me get more comfortable in this new place that I am supposed to call home.
One more thing: I have become quite the chef in the past year. I think I decided to cook myself through all of the moving and house stress. It has worked and a few people have benefited from it. And last week my sister in law even taught me how to make a decent loaf of bread. Not decent, like freaking outstanding! It's amazing. I am addicted and make bread almost everyday now. Yeah, I make bread. Still not grinding my own wheat, and maybe I never will, but...we also made jam and we decided that we could almost pass as pioneer women.

4 year olds rock

2011-04-07T18:05:00.000-07:00

Someone wise once said "4 year olds rock." Maybe it was me that said it; in any case, whoever did was right--they do. Today my Eli is 4 years old. I remember thinking about this day, wondering how weird it would feel to be the mom of a 4 year old when Adam graduated. But here we are, almost fully functioning adults, and it is not weird. It is awesome. Because, again, 4 year olds are awesome. In the last year, Eli has gone from making me feel like I am constantly treading water, to making me feel like there are few people in the world that I would rather sit down and chat with than my own son. He is fun, funny, conversational and witty and hard to keep up with in a totally awesome, extra calorie burning (no longer frustratingly, mind numbingly difficult) way. I love Eli for everything he does to remind me of my husband, whom I also adore. I see absolutely nothing of myself in him. But as I listen to him rattle off quirky made up songs, stubbornly insist on doing things his way (which more often than not turn out to be pretty creative and ingenious,) be a clothes hater, and run circles around me (literally) and everyone else I feel like I get a window into what my husband's childhood must have been like. And at worst, that is humorously frustrating, but at best totally hilarious, interesting and endearing. I am so happy that Eli is in our family. He pretty much makes us what we are. And I like what we are. Love you E.

Fluffer turns one

2011-03-20T14:07:00.000-07:00

Maybe we need to back off of the Fluffer Nutter nickname--Tate wouldn't touch his birthday cake; apparently he has decided to trim down a bit by walking everyday and adhering to a strict diet. He exhibited some serious self control because this was no run of the mill birthday cake: I made a triple chocolate, sweetened condensed milk infused, double layer cake with one layer of homemade caramel and one layer of vanilla frosting. He didn't want it, which was unfortunate because it just made me want it more.

The day was ordinary enough. Play around the house, a trip to Target, lunch, naps, park, BYU basketball, dinner and cake and presents. I just didn't have it in me to do a one year old party. With Tate's birthday timed right in the middle of Adam's dental boards and my prolonged meltdown over how to move 3000 miles away and the larger issue of what the freak to do with our house...sigh. And yes, I am aware that there is a nuclear meltdown in Japan, people dying in Libya and myriad deaths resulting from recent earthquakes, tsunamis and wars and I should shut my mouth about my stupid house and Adam's test. I am just saying both of us were far more inclined to celebrate our mischievous little munchkin in a more relaxed, mundane fashion.

Which brings me to why I love Tate so much. He is easygoing, relatively anyway for an inherent independent spirit who is inhibited by feet that don't move fast enough and screams that don't communicate well enough. He always has a smile for anyone. He is patient and endearing and sensitive...things that I am still learning to understand since I do not have much experience dealing with that sort of people. (It's been over 6 years since I have lived with anyone like that!) Most of all, he loves and adores me. Worships me really. He wants me to hold him and hug him and play with him--also, a new experience for me. I am so confident that this little boy thinks that I am awesome that some days, nothing else matters. Some days it does, and that is just life. But I love being Tate's mom. He has been so fun to have over this whirlwind year. Tate has brought laughter and lightheartedness to our family. He has made our family more complete than it was. I get such a kick out of watching him explore and topple and get up and do it again. So cheers to Fluffer. Good job being born, we love you and think that you rock.

PS I am sorry if anyone is offended that my boys never have clothes on. That's just how we roll here.

This makes me want to move to Montana

2011-01-19T15:27:00.000-08:00

and tell my kids to go play outside and be home before dinner. Maybe I need to move to another century (not state) to fulfill that dream...anyway, speaking of dreams, we went to Joshua Tree to celebrate MLK day. And we had a blast. Joshua Tree is a slightly less cool version of Moab. But it is totally awesome for kids who want to run and climb unrestricted until they are on the brink of dehydration and exhaustion--which we mostly let them do. It won't shock you that Eli only partially liked being in a harness to climb on rocks. But he did really well and we all enjoyed basking and climbing in 85 degree weather in January. And they even let us live our dream for free. So Joshua Tree truly rocks.

This is my favorite-"Here, I will just help you eat the rope Dad..."

Since...whenever

2011-01-18T17:13:00.001-08:00

Seriously. I am sorry I have become the most boring blogger. All I do is report like once a month now. So here is my lame report that will consist mostly of pictures because I have like 5 seconds:

The service project party:

The preschool program:

The Fluff being happy in spite of a week-long bout of viral gastroenteritis...which is a fancy way of saying he was puking for 7 days:

The pretend Christmas morning:

The flooding:

The real Christmas morning:

The resulting train station that was formerly Eli and Tate's room:

The epic snowboarding day:

The epic running day:

Our Christmas card

2010-12-13T15:41:00.001-08:00

Well, I believe I began last year's report with a joke concerning my refusal to join Facebook; so I suppose the introductory joke this year is that my friends will probably be reading this on Facebook.

Besides that most momentous of occasions--mine and Adam's conversion to the cult of Facebook-- 2010 has gone pretty similarly to the three years preceding it: We cleaned up many messes, tried to be nice, got farther into debt and vacationed in Utah. Glamorous right? Other than that, our second son Tate, otherwise lovingly known as Fluffer Nutter, Tater Fluff, or simply Fluff, was born in March...so that was a pretty big deal too. It’s a short report. That being the case, let's discuss the things to which we are looking forward for 2011, shall we?

Adam will graduate from the Loma Linda School of Dentistry in May. He has worked incredibly hard and for many obvious reasons, we are looking forward to it. I have also finally managed to convince him that running is a good idea. Adam is mostly eager to graduate and begin working; we are both eager to follow the advice of propets and economists alike as we begin our ascent out of debt.

Eli is looking forward to perfecting his sharing, listening and being nice to Tate skills on which we have so diligently worked this year. He hopes to amass as many gold stars for practicing those skills as possible. He continually asks me if he can do this or that when his 4…so we have a lot to accomplish beginning April 7th. His tenacity, persistence and energy never cease to amaze us.

Tate is looking forward to being old and big enough to withstand Eli’s attempts to wrestle, smother and generally torment him. He has perfected the speed crawl in an effort to flee his attacker; but unfortunatley his girth, speed, and overall sweet, smiley and adorable temperament have been largely ineffective tools of evasion.

Much of the same could be said for Duane: He spends most of his time trying to avoid attack. Duane’s enthusiasm for running has waned as much as Adam’s has increased. I believe he is hoping to soon become a lap dog…not gonna happen.

All that being said, I am most looking forward to being able to have my boys in the same room without anyone getting hurt. And yes, I realize this could be years away. I am also ready to begin a new chapter in our lives. Mostly I try (try being the operative word in all of this) as often as I can to pause when my boys laugh together, show me or each other affection or do something so hilarious that I am forced to smile and laugh out loud. I measure my level of success as a person and a parent by those moments.

So at this time of year, I have more successes than failures. I think the nature of this most wonderful time of the year is God’s gift to mankind. For that, and countless other blessings, I am indeed grateful. Merry merry Christmas to you; we wish you a more plentiful amount of smile making moments.

Love,
Adam, Ashley, Eli, Tate and Duane

Today was a fairytale

2010-12-09T13:08:00.000-08:00

Not the courtroom kind I used to dream about. And certainly not the Taylor Swift kind. It centered around baking dozens of cookies for several upcoming Christmas parties whilst listening to the highly appealing background sounds of Christmas music, E accurately identifying alphabet letters on his computer, and Tate laughing while playing with Duane. There was also a Vanilla Coke Zero involved, the delectable scent of french vanilla cake cookies (apparently I am a mega fan of vanilla) and NO, I repeat NO, crying, fighting, yelling or breaking of household items. And for a brief moment, I thought "I am a damn good mother!" and then I realized soon after that I wasn't since I had thought that.

I had a similar sentiment as I was putting together our Christmas cards the other day; that activity also involved some Diet Dr. Pepper and Christmas music which almost always equals a good mood. When we took our Christmas pictures, I looked through them 100 times, slightly disappointed that there was not a perfect one that I loved, and that in each one someone was doing something not to my liking. But as I assemebled them, looking at the picture I ultimately chose over and over and over again, I started to just love it for all of its flaws; because they highlight perfectly the personalities of all of the people in it that I adore. It's like when you spend enough time with someone, you start to love them in spite of--if not for-- their inherent flaws. The more I look at our picture, the less I care that Eli isn't looking at the camera, that Tate is drooling and that Adam isn't wearing a huge grin. I am even over the fact that my hair looks like I got electrocuted and that Duane got my shirt all dirty.

I tell you this not to annoy the hell out of you, (see I'm really not a good mother because now I have sworn twice in one post) but to highlight the wonderfulness of the most wonderful time of the year. In church last Sunday, a lady mentioned that she just loved this season because she could feel the spirit of Christ while wrapping presents and decorating the house...it won't shock you that Adam totally made fun of her for that, but I defended her: I think what she meant is that everything is just easier this time of year. Feeling the spirit is easier, getting along is easier, accepting imperfections is easier, simple things elicit immensely strong feelings of gratitude...and even I can have a fairytale morning with my kids.

PS Allison, these are what the cookies were supposed to look like

Recently:

2010-11-22T14:33:00.000-08:00

-Just took the boys to get pictures taken. They turned out all right. I will not go back to JCPenney though, and granted, they probably don't want us back either: They were an HOUR behind schedule and I used a coupon and only bought two pictures. And Eli broke a decoration--seriously, that is what they get for being behind... who puts breakable Christmas decor right outside the portrait studio??? Get a clue. I told them I knew that was what would happen if I was there for more than 20 minutes; so that is what they get for making me sit there and try and keep my kids happy and cute and clean for a flipping hour.
-Our external hard drive and both computers pretty much all croaked at the same time. The laptop still functions. 800 bucks to recover all of our pictures. Fortunatley I have most of them uploaded to Costco and printed out in books. And we can limp along with one special computer until Adam graduates. Oh and our car needed a bunch of work too. Microwave is dying a slow death... Good timing right?
-I have become obsessed with Yoga. I joined the Yoga Room gym as my Christmas present (early) from my mom and Adam. I love it. I am a late convert. I used to go in high school and get so irritated when I didn't sweat or raise my heartrate and then the instructor wanted me to lay there for like ten minutes and relax! But now I think my kids just thoroughly stress me out enough that I like someone to force me to just chill out for a few minutes. That, and this place is awesome. My original objection to yoga-that it is not a sufficient workout-is addressed here; I sweat from my freaking eyebrows and toes.
-Adam has been a total champ in school and work and everything; we are both working-he is editing dental boards study cards and I am editing a health blog. We actually both bring in money each month! Not very much. But it feels really good to be taking baby steps toward self sufficiency.
-Tate is all over the place. He is crawling and climbing everywhere. I think it is a self preservation skill. He is Eli's little brother after all. He is sleeping better, mostly through the night until 5 or so. And he is as sweet and smiley as can be. He has one tooth, is still ginormous and is skeptical of Eli each time he approaches...you would be too if you were regularly sat upon, covered and wrapped up in a blanket or knocked off a chair onto a hard tile floor. Most of my day is spent isolating and occupying the two of them in separate sections of the house so that Tate doesn't sustain any permanent damage.
-Eli is loving school. We have embarked on a new star/reward system which combined with the structure he is receiving in school has done wonders to help him, uh, behave. Thank heaven for the dollar spot at Target...4 gold stars=a new Target toy. He loves Tate and never intends to be mean; he looks eternally forward to the time when I get after Tate for climbing into the dishwasher or the fireplace.
-Last weekend we went to St. George to get away for a few days. Adam's parents came down and played with the boys and it was so so nice. We actually went out to a movie and running by ourselves. And we played in Snow Canyon and what not. I remarked while we were there how grateful I was that while God was creating that beautiful place with all of it's jagged up and down rocks, that he slipped in a few flat parts that are perfect for kids to crawl and climb on. I love that place.

What else...Homeowner's association stuff, kids and work mostly. Adam takes boards in December and March. Graduates in May!! I scoured my house today, and I am now sitting in front of my fireplace (since it is 65 degrees outside and I am now a California cold weenie) in my comfies while I sip on a DDP, listen to Christmas music and enjoy the otherwise quiet hour or so that both of my kids are asleep; at the moment, the world is right.

Halloweeners

2010-11-01T10:52:00.001-07:00

November 1st. Halloween is over. You know what that means: Time to pull out the Christmas music. Yes!

This Halloween was way better than last year because 1-Adam was not in St. Louis 2-I was not pregnant 3-Tate is awesome 4-Eli is way awesome-r than he was last year, at least at listening to me and not running aimlessly away.

Really, our only complication was that Duane did not enjoy his Cat in the Hat costume.
He walked like a crippled crab with the socks on his feet and we laughed at him quite a lot...you might gather from the pictures how dejected and damaged he looks. Oh well, we had fun.

Also, This is what Eli does in our driveway...

we have had ongoing construction in our special little cul de sac pretty much since we moved here. This makes it inconvenient to go anywhere. However, sometimes watching the cement mixers and tractors holds Eli's attention for an extended period of time, something for which I am always looking. And obviously, throwing rocks and climbing dirt hills never gets old. I love boys.

Cheers.

Things I have realized that really should have been obvious

2010-10-05T14:09:00.001-07:00

-Eh. I need my haircut.

-Taking funny face pictures with friends was fun in high school; it's still fun to do with your kids.
-Every child is different. It doesn't matter that I read this 500 million times or that 500 people told me. I have tried every which way to fit Tate into Eli's mold--because that is what I know. He does not. In many ways, this is wonderful. He is his own adorable little sweet person who has smiled in 6 months 90% more than Eli has in almost 4 years. But he does not sleep through the night. He does not take consistent naps. And I have tried everything including moving him, drugging him, letting him cry, rocking him, etc. They are different...unbelievably enough.
-"Slimming" tank tops only work if you are already slim; you never see a fat girl modeling a tank top that is supposed to make you skinny because it doesn't, much to my dismay.
-Making plans for the next day when you are awake in the middle of the night with a crying baby is a bad idea. The middle of the night is the worst time to be making sound plans. Or speaking for that matter. Mean things can be said to people who deserve no such thing.
-Most of the money we will make one day will go to tithing, taxes and loan payments before we even see a dime of it. So I am trying to temper my excitement for Adam to graduate with a measure of discipline and realism.

-Brothers are mean to each other. They don't mean to be mean. They just kind of are.
-Growing your own food, er, having your husband grow your own food is totally satisfying. These are from our humble little garden, pretty huh?
-Fat babies are just absolutely and completely endearing. I don't know if there is just a shortage of babies in general here, but absolute strangers seriously think it is ok to come up and not just remark on, but pinch and squeeze Tate's fat rolls...and I sort of can't blame them.

Princess Leila

2010-09-29T10:41:00.001-07:00

Isn't she adorable? I can't wait to meet my newest little niece. Personally, I don't think she looks much like a princess; I think she is going to be a sassy, tough little chica who likes to play in the dirt with her boy cousins. But that's just me. Leila, I am so glad you are finally here and I forgive you for waiting so long because now I get to come hang out without my boys next week. Wahoo!

Facebook doesn't suck THAT bad and Fall exists outside of California

2010-09-27T15:04:00.000-07:00

I still have two profiles on Facebook. But at least now I can log onto one of them. Still not sure about the whole thing.

We just got back from a ten day excursion to Utah and New Hampshire. Hallelujah for the season of Fall. We got to go dirt-biking and boating in Utah,

walk the "Freedom Trail" in Boston, eat at the impressively delectable "Quincy Market" therein and generally take in the beauty that exists in New England. It was wonderful and a completely positive experience; Tate was so so good. And Eli was partying it up with Nannie and Grandma while we were checking stuff out back East. We also spent time with Marcus before saying goodbye for two years. Between the two or us, Adam and I now have three brothers on Latin-American missions. Pretty sweet.

Anyway, so now I am home. It is a hellish 110 degrees today. Uh. I want to go back to a land where Fall, and Winter, for that matter, exists. I felt like a FedEx coordinator-going back and forth between two houses while we were in Utah, then sending part of my stuff one place, my kids' stuff to other places and then collecting it all again, bringing it home and sorting through it. And now I have to put it all away today. Bother. Oh, and I should probably work since I blew that off for an entire week. I am also especially crabby because my (no doubt adorable) niece Leila failed to make an on time appearance. She was supposed (according to my well laid out plan) to be born the day before I got to Utah so that we could get to know each other for a few days before I had to leave. But noooo... And then she was supposed to debut while I was in New Hampsire and I would stay for a few days extra to hang out. Also, a no go. In fact, she is still not here. She should be here by tomorrow, as her mother is currently attempting to forcefully vacate her through induction... that sounds harsher than I meant, but you know what I mean. So anyway. I am not very happy with her but nonetheless still dying to meet her. I am going back to Utah next weekend to hang out which will actually be more fun since Adam will keep my boys--wahoo, my husband is such a rock star. Good luck to you Chels; I doubt there is anything in the world as wonderful as having a baby, especially your first. My thoughts are with you today, tonight and tomorrow (hopefully not longer than that!!!) Chel.

Facebook sucks

2010-09-16T16:23:00.000-07:00

I knew it. I gave in. I tried. I received like 55 friend request emails, two "Welcome" emails from Facebook itself, and I allowed myself to get all excited to see what the big deal was but OH, wait--I cant login. Facebook doesn't recognize my email address as linked to my profile and their super unhelpful customer service sent me directly back to the "Help" page which was also nothing but a hugely unhelpful timesuck. So basically my profile exists on Facebook but I cannot do anything with it because I cannot log in. I have managed to waste all kinds of time on Facebook, trying to figure out how to solve this problem, without even Facebooking!!

So anyway. My long awaited arrival to the Facebook was a hoax, even to me. I apparently won't be socializing there.

We are heading to Utah tomorrow and I am finding myself sort of freaking out that Eli is going to miss a whole week of school. I know, it's preschool. But it just kind of reinforces that nagging feeling that I have had ever since Tate was born..."Ok, I am a real mom now. Whoa."

Here are some pictures of his first day that I forgot to post. He loves it. And when I picked him up yesterday, his teacher enthusiastically greeted me with the encouraging words, "Oh, he just keeps getting better every day! He didn't bite any friends today and he brought his listening ears." Music, I tell you; you will never understand how happy this makes me until you have an Eli. Needless to say, he had a bit of a rough start but I think preschool is definitely starting to serve its many purposes.

The summer in review

2010-09-09T21:04:00.000-07:00

Just posted my whole summer. Or the things I can remember anyway, which isn't very reliable because I'm going on nearly six months of sleep deprivation...yeah, my tank child still wakes up at night. Don't get me started. Here are some other bullet points and pictures worth mentioning:

-Two kids is no joke. But I am starting to understand why people have multiple children: Tate and Eli are beginning to be best little wrestling buddies. And now that I am mostly over my anxiety of Eli hurting Tate, I enjoy watching them play so much.

-Tate is not very small. He wears all of Eli's 18 month clothing. The kid weighs 22 pounds. We call him Fluffer Nutter after my Aunt Stephanie's peanut butter and marshmallow cream sandwiches. Appropriate, no? So I think he is ready to fend for himself.

-My family, with the exception of pregnant Chel and Britten, came out for one final hurrah before Alex left. We had so much fun-swimming, beach, eating, pool, Angel's game, etc.

I bawled when they left. And I have been a disaster ever since since it JUST NOW occurred to me that I have to send my boys away someday. He left for Brazil last Wed and all of us were pretty much blindsided by how hard it was to say goodbye. But, upon receiving his first email yesterday, I can already feel the blessings that pour when a family has a missionary out.

-Eli started preschool. He loves it. And I have time to work and generally collect myself three days a week. What a little punk.

-Things are good. I can't brag too much about how awesome Adam is doing in school...but he is. He'll technically be done with graduation requirements in about a month. And he is no longer stressed about patients or procedures-- ESPECIALLY since football started last Saturday! Hooray, finally. We look forward to sitting on our couch, eating food like rednecks and literally watching football ALL DAY long. Let the games begin.

Heber Creeper and THE CHUM!!!

2010-09-09T20:53:00.000-07:00

Eli's favorite thing:
TRAINS. Fortunately, he has a dad and Grandma who were willing to indulge him with a ride on the Heber Creeper. None of the rest of us felt....up to it.

My favorite thing:
PAWN STARS

Your eyes are not deceiving you--that is CHUMLEE! We seriously stopped at the Pawn Shop on the way home. It was sick.

THE RANCH

2010-09-09T19:51:00.001-07:00

This is the best place in the world. And even though it was unspeakably harder with two kids this year, we still had a wonderful time. Not very many pictures, fewer intense outdoor activities, but just as much top quality time with all of my favorite people.

Almost forgot the two highlights of my summer:

2010-09-09T19:33:00.000-07:00

Before we went to Utah for the long long vacation which I am obviously still trying to recover from since it has taken me three months to post about it....my sisters in law made a trip out here so we could go to a friend shower for Ashley and take Audrey and Eli to Disneyland. Eli is finally tall enough to go on a few roller coasters, namely the Matterhorn and whatever that one in ToonTown is called. So we took them. And it was a blast. He was scared and apprehensive. Olivia and I just decided that we were going to make our kids do it because we knew they would love it. And it was so fun. They both loved it. Seriously, aside from the births of my children, it was the most exhilirating moment I have had as a parent thus far-because I knew I would love this part of being a mom. And I felt the same way when we went to Utah and took Eli out on the boat; Adam, Eli and I went on a pretty decently paced tube ride. And at the end, we even pulled him off into the water. Watching his face as he begins to experience some of my own very favorite recreational activities is such a thrill. And it is those two moments that I look back on and remember when I feel, as I often do, like I am drowning as I try and take care of my two kids and everything that follows that.

Kolob Canyon and Tater's blessing

2010-09-09T19:15:00.000-07:00

On the way to Utah this summer, we stopped and hiked a little in Kolob Canyon. I just love this place. I just love Utah. What a freaking cool place.

Once we got to Utah, the first order of business was to bless Taterbug. And we did. It was awesome. We had both of our families at the Burr's house. We love this little guy and are so glad to have him in our family.

What a party!

2010-09-09T19:08:00.000-07:00

What a remarkably fun night. Not too many people get to attend a senate election victory party in their lifetime; I was glad I got to. Congratulations Mike.

I LIKE MIKE

2010-06-21T13:54:00.000-07:00

PLEASE GO VOTE FOR HIM TOMORROW!!!!!
Hi folks. It has been a while. I am in Utah right now, eagerly awaiting the resutlts of tomorrow's senate primary race. As a former Utahn, unable to currently exercise my right to vote in the state, I want to give my plug for my favorite candidate (and uncle) for the United States senate. Mike Lee rocks. So any of you fine people who are registered residents, please consider voting for Mike. Here is why:

-Mike was literally born for this job. He would never tell you that. Contrary to repeated attacks of arrogance, Mike is one of the most capable people I know who still manages to keep his feet on the ground. He is bright, extremely well qualified, well educated and has been uniquely prepared, since the day he was born, to make a difference in the United States Senate--but make no mistake...I am the one telling you that because I know him well enough to know, not because he is arrogant enough to presume the job is his.
-Mike is hilarious. And loud. Sometimes we just laugh at how loud he is. He will make his voice heard as your senator in every possible way, figuratively through his skills as a Constitutional scholar and literally with his, shall we say, fine tuned vocal chords. Mike has the unique ability to absolutely mezmerize his listeners whether he is discussing the Commerce clause or the right way to build a sandwich. He knows no other way than to be a strong, decisive and convincing leader; he will be just that on the Senate floor as he implements his intellectual prowess and sharp understanding of the US Constitution for the good of the state; he will do it through a strong felt belief in the need for government to limit itself and adhere to the principles contained in our founding document. He will make his point by wowing his audience with a profound ability to think deeply on the spot, clearly articulate his thoughts, make EVERYTHING interesting and exciting, and damnit, make you laugh until you pee your pants if necessary.
-Mike is one of the most honest people I know. As your senator, I know without a shadow of a doubt that he will do everything possible to hold himself to the promises that he has made in his campaign, such as:
-repeal the healthcare legislation
-set both House and Senate term limits to 12 years
-return more governing power to the states
-balance the federal budget
-keep federal budget at or below 15% of GDP
-institute a flat tax

Please vote for Mike. Obviously I love Mike because he is my uncle. He is smart, funny, charismatic and so so very fun to be around. There are very few people I would rather sit down and just chat with. But more than that, I can absolutely vouch for his work ethic, honesty, integrity and knowledge of the job that lies before him as your senator. Furthermore, his wife rocks too. No good man can do anything good without a good woman next to him. Sharon is absolutely that good woman in addition to being incredibly bright and eloquent herself.

PLEASE GO VOTE FOR MIKE LEE FOR US SENATE--TOMORROW. TRUST ME. HE ROCKS.

Really!?!

2010-06-07T18:51:00.001-07:00

Why?

Because of...

Thanks to...

Best Mother's Day ever

2010-05-10T14:57:00.000-07:00

A happy Mother's day indeed. I am this happy today-maybe even more!

Because I got the best Mother's Day present ever: They are back!

Adam asked me on Saturday what I wanted for Mother's Day. Aside from the fact that it was a little late to be asking...I had no response because I did not think it was fair to ask for the impossible. What I really wanted was to have my lost wedding rings back. He read my mind anyway though and we went back through the events of the day I lost them. He asked if I did anything before I changed-sat on the couch or went anywhere. I said I might have sat down on the couch to nurse the baby but I already looked in, around and underneath the couch several times. He asked if I looked in the little velcro pocket behind the couch. I said I did not know what he was talking about...

So on Sunday morning, I was sitting on the couch watching Meet the Press and nursing the baby. Adam started looking in these alleged "pockets" and found some coins for Eli to put in his pig. I heard some things drop out but didn't think anything of it because I knew they had already found change and cheerios and I did not want to get my hopes up that it might be a diamond ring. Then Adam got out his pliers and a flashlight for what I thought was another futile search. A few minutes later he held up all three rings. I was floored. I covered my mouth as tears started streaming down my face. Does my husband have perfect timing or what? He remarked that he has only been able to get that kind of reaction out of me two times: Both the times he has given me the same ring.

So anyway, his ACTUAL present-another replacement ring he made in the lab- was a little bit overshadowed by the discovery of the lost rings, but I still love this one too. And I don't know where he found time to make it but here it is:

My husband completely rocks. I think I left a comment on my sister in law's blog on Saturday remarking that the Burr boys are excellent problem solvers and that I could not think of a problem that Adam could not solve. How true it is. Give him enough time, and he can do just about anything.

And Eli, bless his little heart, made this cute little flower pot for me at Home Depot. Every first Saturday of the month, Eli puts on his orange aapron
and he and Adam head to Home Depot for a project. Last Saturday he made this for Mother's Day with his cute little friend Hailey. It's the cutest thing. They worship him there! And Adam gets so excited to take him because, duh, he gets to go to Home Depot which is the coolest place ever, second only to Costco or his own couch.

So happy Mother's day to every mother I love. I think I had the happiest one though.

Random bits of information

2010-05-08T16:54:00.000-07:00

1-I'm a sucker. Either that, or having two kids is less complicated than I thought it would be...or I just need something fun to do with both of them. In any case, I decided to renew my Disneyland pass. We are going on Tuesday to meet my aunts and cousins and I confess, I am happy about it.
2-I have been making a conscious effort to drink eight cups of water everyday and I have noticed that the texture and clarity of my skin has improved; has anyone else ever made this connection? And if that is a real thing, do you know why that is?
3-I have been stuck at the same weight since Tate was two weeks old. For the first ten days, I was losing like a pound a day making absolutely zero effort and it was awesome; now that I am really trying, the scale won't budge and it's starting to really aggravate me.
4-My sister is having a girl! I'm so excited to have another little niece...however, I need someone in my family to step up to the plate and produce a boy so I can share all of my boy clothes.
5-Adam has precisely one year of school left. That makes me very very happy.
6-Which reminds me, every time I get mad at Eli for doing something that Eli does, he retorts, "Are you happy?" I wish he would ask me that question sometime OTHER than when he has deliberately done something to make me unhappy.
7-Tate is a rockstar for the following reasons:
-He does not spit up!
-He has several chins to spare
-He is extremely easily pacified; I almost always know precisely why he is crying, which means I can easily address his problem which makes my job very fulfilling.
An area where he could improve:
-Sleeping...um, while I love that he is a cuddly little Taterbug, I don't love him sleeping in my bed. He far prefers to sleep on someone's chest or nestled in the crook of an arm. He will sleep for no more than an hour stretch in his own cradle. And though he weighs a perhaps too healthy fourteen pounds, he is still under the impression that he needs a meal in the middle of the night--not so my friend.
8-I love to run. After 9 months of pregnancy, it feels so good to take in a deep breath and have the air go ALL THE WAY to my lungs. I got into the St. George marathon for October of this year. So it is officially training time.
8-Wow, my thoughts pretty much revolve around myself and my kids. Got to get back to my religious news watching habits and read something other than, What to expect the first year.

Just FYE

2010-04-21T21:47:00.000-07:00

Love these boys.

Bringing home the bacon...or some form of ultra cheap pork product

2010-04-20T21:32:00.000-07:00

I still can't believe that I got a kid that looks like me. They really don't look alike at all.

Anyway...about three days before Tate was born, I got a job offer to write some articles for a weight loss website. Perfect timing right? Literally, I haven't worked for over a year. I pretty much stopped for Thanksgiving and Christmas 2008, then decided to apply to law school over the next four months, and then I got pregnant and sick and almost widowed while my husband relocated to the dental lab; so somehow I never really got back into applying for any writing jobs for like fourteen months. And then out of nowhere, I received an email to write for this website while I was not-so-patiently awaiting my son's arrival.

Aside from the timing though, this little part time job has been so nice. I have been working about two hours a day, which is absolutely ideal. I hope this one lasts for a little while; I feel like I have such a complete sense of balance, which I don't get any other way, when I do something I like and get paid for it. Not only that, but working also forces me to get more done earlier and more efficiently since I know I have to spend the kids' (whoa, I have kids ) nap time working. Anyway, I love it. And I am glad for the opportunity, even if it is short-lived like the other miscellaneous projects I have done since becoming a mom.

Oh, and get this: Adam (in all his spare time...ha!) is working a little bit too! He has been editing study cards for the dental board examination. Honestly, sometimes I don't comprehend how he manages to do all the things he does. But it's kind of cute, really; we put the kids to bed and sit down every night around 8pm to work for an hour. So between the two of us, we are like ALMOST holding down one part time job!!! We are moving closer and closer to being fully functioning members of society!

In other news, here are some pictures of my not so very little little man. You may be wondering if I am feeding him butter....it would certainly appear that way. Either that, or someone is injecting it right into his cheeks.

What do you think?

2010-04-09T15:31:00.001-07:00

Is this who baby Tate looks like?

PS This is me

Happy Birthday Eli

2010-04-09T14:55:00.000-07:00

Dear E-
Happy Birthday (2 days late...) my big little boy. I cannot believe you are three. Three years ago you made me a mom; three weeks ago, I made you a brother. And you have been such a good one. I know most of the time you just don't want to do what I tell you; but we'll pretend that you are just filled with brotherly love and concern for Tate when you tell me, "Oh, no! I just gotta go check on baby Tate." And I laughed my head off when you told your Nannie what was wrong with Tate's belly button: "Um, it gots poop in it."

Eli the last three years, just you and me, have been a riot. Literally. I have loved watching you mature and become the quirky little hilarious creature that you are. Your beautiful blonde little head and your smooth tan skin remind me how much I adore you when your often erratic behavior might otherwise place you in jeopardy! I love everything about you Eli: I love that you remind me so much of your dad. I love the songs you make up, the questions you ask and I even love your clever forms of evasive disobedience. You are a crazy crazy little child and I love you for it. You keep me always on my toes. I am so happy that you are the first of our family...there is no way that, with you as an oldest sibling, we won't just have a total blast together.

*** Eli got to have his Grandma and Grandpa Burr here for his birthday. And it was quite a day: He went to the breakfast buffet at the Marriot, made a trip to Costco (complete, of course, with running laps around "the cold" and seeing the wash,) received his great grandparents for a lunch call, went to a petting zoo, ate at the Spaghetti Factory and opened presents which he has since (36 hours later) been playing with non stop.

My first day alone with two kids

2010-04-05T14:14:00.000-07:00

I have spent more of the day screaming at Eli while my baby was screaming than I would care to admit. But I did make it into the shower and neither of them are starving to death. And my in-laws will be here in approximately three hours. So good first day.

No, I have not found my rings. On to happier things.

The last two weeks have pretty much disappeared. The first week I had Adam home all week, which was wonderful; he took Eli camping for one night and we went down to the beach for a day. I love the picture of Eli with his walking stick; he looks like an Old Testament prophet in jeans! And doesn't my husband rock for taking the kid AND the dog AND taking pictures?

The second week of Tate's life, my mom and sister came and we had a wonderful time hanging out, admiring baby, walking, making repeated runs to Target, and being entertained by Eli. I was sad to see both of them go and must admit that, at least today anyway, I really wish that I lived in Utah. I know that is silly....your mom only cleans your bathrooms, ovens, stovetops and does your laundry WHILE taking care of and coddling your two kids in between repairing all of your husband's favorite shoes if you live in a different state. So I suppose the spoils of the past week are a direct result of living away from my family.

I cannot begin to express how thankful I am for a mom who taught me so well how to be a mom. This is a tough business. I have a mom who manages it all so well, who is so competent at so many things and who is also beautiful and fit and funny and smart. I don't know how I would figure all of this out on my own if I hadn't had a mom (and grandmas, and aunts and so forth) who did it all with such seamless grace.

This is not a post baby hormonal breakdown

2010-03-24T17:05:00.000-07:00

I bawled my eyes out today. You would too.

Roughly fifty years ago, my grandpa gave my grandma a small, plain gold band; she was pregnant and her wedding ring didn't fit her swollen hands. Over the years, it became my mother's. Over more years, it became mine. I wore it to work at Pizza Factory so that I wouldn't get my diamond dirty once Adam and I got engaged.

Roughly five years ago, my sweet husband gave me a beautiful, emerald cut diamond set in a thin gold band and asked me to marry him. Before I got that ring, I cared nothing about "the ring." I just knew I wanted the man. But when he got down on one knee on the top of a cornice at the Park City ski resort and opened that little red box, my heart almost burst. I had no idea what that ring would mean to me in and of itself.

Roughly five weeks ago, my husband bestowed me with another ring-this time exhibiting the amazing side talent of working in a dental lab and learning how to cast gold crowns. For my 26th birthday/5th anniversary, Adam MADE a planished gold band. I was amazed at how beautiful and how NOT amateur a piece of jewelry it was. And it meant so much that he made it with his own two hands.

Last night I had all three of these important rings on. In one swift move, Tate peed and pooped all over me, him, the curtains and the rug while I was in the middle of changing him. In a panicked moment of trying to control the damage, I took off all three rings and put them in my left pocket. I cleaned Tate up and forgot all about them until I got out of the shower today and went to put my rings on. They were not in my jewelry box. My stomach dropped as I remembered what I did last night. I ran to the washer where the pants I had been wearing were spinning around. Not there. Adam spent the entire day taking apart our washer. I searched every piece of laundry, every square inch of our carpet, checked and rechecked each of our hampers and broke down in between each unsuccessful attempt to locate my wedding rings. I am devastated beyond belief.

I don't usually fall prey to the "why?" question or second guess the things I do. I know stuff happens. But hell. WHY couldn't I have just walked ten steps away and put them in my box where they belong? WHY couldn't I have just kept them ON and washed my hands after? And how the hell did they get out of my pants, up through the slit in the washer, and down through at least two separate drain traps? It's maddening and I know I need to stop that circular thought process and somehow make peace with it but I feel like a part of me has died. And all the while I am supposed to be just basking in this new little life I have created. That's what I want to be doing; he is such a sweetheart. But my heart is utterly and completely broken.

some more pictures

2010-03-21T20:24:00.000-07:00

We're home, we're good and we're all glad to have a healthy baby. It was such a wonderfully contrasting experience to immediately have your baby handed to you, have him cry, stare at him and try to decide who he looks like rather than worry about whether or not he is breathing or when you might be able to take him home.

At this point, Eli probably needs more recovery from his big weekend than I do: Our awesome friends took him down to San Diego for a day at Legoland and other miscellaneous fun...don't worry, they have six month old triplets and a three year old too; for the record, I told her she was crazy but I consented to let him go because 1-I was about to give birth to a baby and I hadn't had an epidural yet and 2- when someone offers to do something that nice, you become the crazy one if you turn them down. So two days of no naps and extreme fun has left Eli a little out of sorts. He likes Tate, but only on his terms. Any suggestions from us that Eli hold or kiss him have been flatly rejected. Frankly, the fact that Eli hasn't deliberately hurt the baby or burned our house down yet is encouraging.

Tate Steven Burr

2010-03-19T20:56:00.000-07:00

Tate (wahoo-he shant remain nameless!) was born this morning at 10:19 am. He is as healthy as a newborn can be; it is far more fun, not to mention less stressful, to hold your baby after he is born rather than to have him whisked away to the NICU.

This is how we do (well, did) it

2010-03-09T19:01:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, I made Adam go down to Disneyland for one last time. He wasn't thrilled. Naturally, it was raining. But I insisted because we have been a hundred times this year and never taken any pictures. So I wanted my photographer to come (I am not allowed to handle the nice camera anymore since I have both left it in Huntington Beach and dropped it on the tile floor) to document the fact that we ACTUALLY DID take our kid to Disneyland.

Well, as you can see, the pictures don't really do much to verify that...No character shots, no princess sightings, no giant smiles in front of the castle. You can run away from your parents, scowl, and suck on a railing pretty much anywhere. But they tell the truth: This is what Disney is like for us. And Adam couldn't be more thrilled; he now has the picture of Eli licking the railing on his screensaver, which I am going to go ahead and assert means that he thinks having to go to Disneyland was worth it.

PS Clearly a big anorak on a big pregnant stomach is a bad idea; lesson learned.

Eviction notice

2010-03-05T19:03:00.000-08:00

Dear baby-

Get out. You have two weeks; however, it would be greatly appreciated if you would vacate the premises much sooner.

Love you.

Mom

Eli's big weekend and my new favorite show

2010-03-02T08:20:00.000-08:00

Eli freakin traveled like a rock star this weekend: He got to ride to Utah in the plush bus house-eating chips, roaming around, watching movies, napping on the king size bed and generally driving everyone crazy for 9 hours; and then he got to ride home in his Grandpa's homebuilt airplane, which is also not too shabby...please notice the big bold word printed on the doorway of the aircraft; I was only racked by tormenting thoughts of being a widow and single parent to one child for like an hour.

Also, has anyone else fallen in love with this show? It's called Pawn Stars and I am obsessed. It's about these guys who own a pawn shop in Las Vegas and any lover of history will get sucked right in; people stumble upon these treasures and bring them in and it is so fascinating--AND there is a guy named CHUMLEE-that's right, Chumlee! Trust me, he is as much of a character as his name would indicate. So I don't care if you think I am a loser, I love this show.

It's so quiet here

2010-02-26T13:05:00.000-08:00

My people just left for two days in the "bus house." My inlaws came down for the past few days in their motorhome, played non-stop with my son, took us out to dinner AND are giving me two and a half days of solitude. I like them. I like the quiet. Here is what I am going to do this weekend:

-Finish the birthday sign I started for Eli--since that is pretty much all I will probably do by way of celebration
-Return some baby stuff/get the last few things I need WITHOUT Eli's help
-Print and pickup pictures for photo albums
-Start man cub's baby book
-Get a pedicure for my disgusting, calloused, chipped-paint toes that I can no longer reach
-Go get a new toilet bowl lid for the one I clumsily broke while trying to clean it
-Take a nap
-Prepare the lesson for the Gospel Essentials class that I am scared to death to teach on Sunday...this is the only drawback of Adam leaving with my son for two days; I have to teach his class which we have both agreed ONLY a returned missionary should teach. Hmmmm.

I know, with the exception of the pedicure, that this doesn't look like a particularly exciting list of things to do. But I can't tell you how thrilled I am to run errands without Eli. I adore the kid, you all know I do. But he is not the easiest of errand pals...and at 37 weeks pregnant, it is really all I can do to carry myself around much less a hyperactive, uncooperative two year old.

So I am so glad that my boys are riding in the bus house, spending time with family and having a great time; I said goodbye to all of them fifteen minutes ago, realizing that the next time I see my brother in law, who is leaving for a mission to Argentina in two weeks, I will have a different two year old than the one I have now! A little bit surreal. And hopefully I will look a little bit different too. I am proud of Matt and wish I could be there to hear him speak. But I already told you I was excited to be by myself this weekend. It was nice to get to spend time with Matt before he leaves and I am glad that Adam and Eli get to be there to support him this weekend.

All right. Myself and I have things to do. I love the quiet. I am sure it will get lonely and boring by tomorrow, but twenty minutes into it, I love it.

Inventory

2010-02-16T07:55:00.000-08:00

-1 wedding
-2 graduations
-1 dog
-2 kids (nearly)
-2 moves
-5 (and counting) continuous years in school
-A few good fights/no divorces...:)
-Some pounds lost and gained
-Multiple lessons learned
-Many memorable trips: British Columbia, Hawaii, Moab, Ecuador, Mexico, Nicaragua
-Lots of shared hobbies: snowboarding, hiking, debating
-Countless hours of History channel watching
-Scary amount of debt
-Infinite number of smiles and laughs
Total: 5 good years. Here is to 5 great more. And forever after that. Love you Adam.

The room is ready

2010-02-15T13:48:00.000-08:00

It's amazing how many things we don't get done during football season; now that it is officially over, (sigh), I have had us on a strict dejunking, reorganizing and cleaning out the crap Saturday schedule. Call it nesting. Call it Spring cleaning. Call it catching up on all the stuff we didn't do because we were sitting on our couch watching football every Saturday for five months. I don't know what to call it but it has felt so good. And now we are officially ready for the boy who has no name to arrive...except for the fact that he still doesn't have a name.

It's more than a little crowded. But they are boys. I am excited.

One thing I absolutely love about California

2010-02-08T13:54:00.001-08:00

No other state has them: Adorable little blonde haired, tanned skin surfer boys who are tough and cool and awesome; nothing is nearly as cute as a dad and his boys running down to the beach with their surf boards. Eli is posing as one of these uniquely California specimens at the ripe age of 2.5; too bad he will not grow up to fulfill his full potential as a surfing junkie since his parents are otherwise unenamored by the rest of the state.

Things

2010-01-28T15:14:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I have been so absentee. I guess I am following the advice of Thumper: "If you can't say nothing nice, don't say nothing at all..." Although I don't know why I would be doing so now since I don't generally live by that creed anyway. Mostly, this pregnancy is not very fun. That is the most positive way I know how to put it. And while I can't wait to NOT be pregnant, have two boys, expand our family, solve the name issue, etc. etc. I find myself somewhat saddened by the impending loss of my status as a mom of one.

You all know that I am no particular fanatic fan of Disneyland. This is Eli and I enjoying Dumbo, and my wild animal in his cage on the Casey Junior train; incidentally, Jennifer Garner but in front of us in line for Peter Pan yesterday. Brat. Anyway, our passes expire on Feb 19th and I find myself somewhat sad...don't jump to any conclusions people. I think it has more to do with the fact that the timing coincides so closely with the birth of our second child, putting an end not only to MINE and ELI's ability to just buzz down to Disneyland and spend a few hours, but to do ANYTHING like that with relative ease. I mean, once you have two kids, it's like you are a real mom. And it's no longer just you and your little shadow, but TWO little shadows. For almost three years, it's just been Eli and me. (And Duane, but he kind of doesn't count....soon he really won't count.) Disneyland, for me, has represented mine and Eli's ability to improvise, to go with whatever the day presents, and to take off pretty easily if we wanted to. I am sad to lose that. And to lose the one on one time I have thus far been mandated to spend with my only child.

I know a lot of other things are going to change; for most of them, I am very excited. But I find myself a little bit sad that it's not just me and Eli during the day and not just the three of us when Adam is home and not just our easy little routine to which I have gotten so used. And I am not really sure how Eli will react. Ultimately, it's a net positive for a kid to have a sibling. But I nonetheless worry (frivolously, I know,) how the one that has been my sole focus for the last three years will react to NOT being the sole focus anymore. And it is just the tiniest bit sad. Mostly happy, but the tiniest bit sad.

Anyway, not much has been going on. I am mostly just trying to get through the days. Eli is doing a lot better since his potty power relapse, and for that I am grateful. I feel like my life paradigm has reversed from trying to maximize my calorie burning potential in a day to doing absolutely anything to avoid moving because it just hurts. I am not a good sedentary person (as you may or may not be able to tell from the somber tone of this post.) Life is not nearly enjoyable as a crippled invalid, it turns out. I am thankful that under normal circumstances, that I am a healthy, high functioning person. Here is to exercise and the ability to move freely-seven more weeks!

Potty Power no more

2010-01-06T18:39:00.000-08:00

We have a domestic disaster on our hands. And I am not talking about health care. I am talking about Eli's complete abandonment of his potty powers. Does anyone else have a child who regularly poops at least two times, sometimes three, a day? Ok, that's annoying enough even when he is doing it in the toilet; when he decides to completely revert back to pooping in his underwear...I won't even say it lest I offend you or encourage you to call CPS. I did not realize how integral me arranging my entire day around Eli's bathroom schedule contributed to him being "potty trained" until we went to Utah for two weeks-which was wonderful- and I allowed other people to worry about it. I am so completely frustrated and sad that all of the hard work we both did for 3 months has been obliterated. HELP.

And here are our Christmas pictures. We didn't take very many. I feel sort of bad about it but I am not in a particularly picture happy mood at almost seven months pregnant. We had such a good time. We spent two days in St. George hiking and hanging with Ben, Olivia and kids. And then a week at each of our parents' houses which was wonderful. Adam's brother got his mission call to Argentina so we went through the temple with him and that was really nice to be there for that. I miss the snow and all of the people I love in Utah, but I must say I am glad to be back home. Happy new year...I will just say at this point that I hope 2010 gets better than it has started out.

Hellthy holidays everyone

2009-12-27T14:21:00.000-08:00

Cheers to government mandated health insurance and no idea how to pay for it!

I won't say much about this lovely Christmas present from the United States Congress but here was my favorite comment (I wish it was my own) from this article:
Let me get this straight. Obama’s health care plan will be written by a committee whose Chairman says he doesn’t understand it, passed by a Congress which hasn’t read it, signed by a President who smokes, funded by a Treasury Chief who did not pay his taxes, overseen by a Surgeon General who is obese, and financed by a country that is nearly broke. Democrats in action. I’m impressed.

Merry Christmas

2009-12-16T13:16:00.000-08:00

So I guess we were bad this year. Instead of just getting a lump of coal (that we didn't have to pay for,) we get to choose between spending a lot of money to fix our thirty year old broken garage door, or even more money for a new one. Oh, and we have had two break-ins in our complex in the last two weeks- and a freaking wild boar(what the??!!) wandering around three houses up from us today; so before we even decided about which of the bad options we would like to do, we had to spend 150.00 JUST to get it down so that we could leave our house secure for two weeks while we go to Utah. HO HO HO!

Hopefully you have all been on better behavior, or at least will just get something crappy for Christmas that doesn't cost you any money! Adios and Merry Christmas to all my peeps in Loma Linda, and I can't wait to see all of you and the snow and the cold in Utah! Adam has two more finals and then we are out of here. Let the festivities begin-wahoo!-can't wait for things like this:

Reasons why I should adopt some older children:

2009-12-02T14:27:00.001-08:00

They can be helpful and adorable...and you already know what you are getting!

...Sometimes they turn out to be professional football players AND terrific big brothers! btw, this story/movie was phenomenal.

And they entertain your younger children without being asked because all they are really doing is entertaining themselves.

We had a blast over Thanksgiving. We went down to Phoenix to my aunt Wendy's house. Perfect group, perfect size, perfect food, perfect relaxation and perfect company. We swam, played a new game that the boys made out of PVC pipe and golf balls, went boating, running, watched football, watched movies about football and generally enjoyed the company of people we really, really like-which in my mind, is precisely what Thanksgiving is about. It's my favorite holiday by a long shot.

Reminiscing

2009-11-23T14:12:00.000-08:00

Can you believe Eli wore this little "up to 7 lbs" outfit? Abeit, not very long...he weighed about 20 lbs by the time he was six months. But hey, that's fine with me: Come out tiny and get huge quickly. Oh man, I sure hope I get another six pound baby!

Today I am pulling out all of Eli's baby clothes; that boy was well dressed from day one! I am so excited that I get to use all of this darling stuff again. Unfortunately, I am not a laundry wizard like my mom or mother in law yet, and most of the stuff has yellow stains. They aren't bad...but for a newborn baby you just want everything perfectly fresh and perfect you know? I am going through and spot treating all of it and then I am going to wash it in Dreft and Oxyclean. If this doesn't work, does anyone else have any stellar suggestions?

Question

2009-11-18T16:08:00.000-08:00

Are you and/or your child(ren) getting the HINI vaccine? If not, why not? I was flabbergasted when I read yesterday that of the thirty something percent of people who said "no" to this question, that 76% thought that it was unsafe...and that reason was only one of like eight different possible responses.

We don't even have access to it yet-except at the public health office, which I have pretty much ruled out since I think there is a greater chance of contracting the swine flu just by going down there than by not. But there has been SUCH an uproar at Adam's school over having the shot mandated; I say it's just an inconvenient part of being a health care professional and people who chose that profession should buck up and take one for the team...I really don't see what the big deal is.

But are any of you who have the option really worried about it?

Somewhat lacking in manners

2009-11-10T10:58:00.000-08:00

Does this look like the face of a perfectly polite boy? That is a rhetorical question.

I love this age. Eli is just old enough to have a pretty decent command of vocabulary and ABSOLUTELY zero concept of propriety: A few minutes ago, he walked into the kitchen stark naked-- keeping him in underwear, to say nothing of fully dressed, is my new full time job. He came right up to me, turned around, bent over so as to stick his bare bottom directly at me and commanded "Scratch it my bum mom?"

Burr boys aren't universally known for their manners so I suppose there is a decent argument that he comes by some of that genetically; but I'm also sure that there is a very distinct age where kids just figure out how to talk and are still completely unbound by social decorum. Either way, it's freaking funny.

Boys rock

2009-11-03T14:13:00.001-08:00

So we are ecstatic to be having another one! Boys have always made my life more interesting and exciting; I have always enjoyed being the only girl and I am glad that that situation is destined to continue.

The one problem? Adam and I exhausted every possible name in the UNIVERSE last time and already used the one name on which we could both agree. Help! Here are Adam's rules...(seriously, I used to think I was an opinionated person; now I think I am pretty laid back.)

1.NO verbs (so like Chase, which I love, is out)
2.No name combinations or made up names
3.No names that rhyme with anything stupid that other kids will make fun of
4.Can't end in R (our last name is Burr)
5.No names that start with D (initials would be DB)
6.No names of anyone that Adam has EVER in his life known, met, saw, talked to, heard of or imagined that wasn't cool...I double dog dare you to try and get around this last rule.

I tried

2009-11-01T19:21:00.000-08:00

Halloween was a little bit tricky this year. My helpmate (and photographer) was in, of all places, St. Louis-and he didn't even get to see Nelly!!!

So these are the most decent pictures I could muster. You can't even see his cute mini football, or that his authentic number 10 jersey says MANNING on the back. I tried really hard...by Friday night, after our ward trunk or treat, a library costume party and an attempted 30 minute photo shoot, I was more than a little bit Halloweened out. But I managed to pull it together and take him trick or treating and to one more trunk or treat party-mostly because they had a bounce house, which I foolishly presumed would mitigate the effects of the time change; it didn't work. He woke up at 4:30 am this morning.

Cheers to no more ASDA conferences over Halloween- a holiday where two parents are an absolute must.

We've reconciled

2009-10-25T20:36:00.000-07:00

WARNING: There is a hilarious picture which exaggerates the point of this post at the end; do not scroll down if you are offended by a woman in a bra and underwear.

Anyway, some of you may remember that I was rather upset about this discovery early last year. Finding out that my, obviously, favorite mirror in the house was a skinny mirror was irritating. Being the kind of girl that I am, one who has no tolerance for sugar coating or distorted realities, I generally don't find any satisfaction in seeing an image of myself which is not real: When I ask my husband, or anyone for that matter, if my outfit makes me look fat, I genuinely want to know the truth--why would I want to wear something out in public that doesn't look good on me? So naturally, I felt betrayed by my skinny mirror when I found out.

No more. We are friends once again. It turns out that the awkward image of a midway through pregnancy me makes the fictitious version of myself too compelling to resist. I know, I know. It's not true; I don't look like what the skinny mirror says I do. But it looks so much better than the real version that I have just decided to go to the dark, fake, skinnier side.

So, at least for now, until I reach the "cute" point of pregnancy-you know, that very narrow window of time where your stomach is just big and round enough as to make every other part of your body appear proportionally smaller and cuter--I will take comfort in a lie. Actually, let's be honest, that stage is fleeting as your body gives way to incredible hugeness, swelling and misery; so it could be an incredibly long time before I am prepared to face the real me again. Cheers to the skinny mirror! Ha ha ha...I hope it's not this bad...

The two (mostly) happiest places on Earth

2009-10-16T16:04:00.000-07:00

DISNEYLAND: Eli made it through an entire day at Disneyland without a single bathroom incident-what a potty power champ! We took the day, braved the rain and met my cousins (twelve of them!) aunts and uncles at the happiest place on Earth. And only one child, Mr. Sammy the Wimmer, was temporarily lost the whole day. So it was definitely a huge success.

COSTCO: Like most people who hail from the great "This is the place," we are devoted and loyal Costco fans. I am particularly so because it is the only place that my husband enjoys to shop. However, I was wondering if anyone has been irked by the enforcement over the past year of the entrance "card flashing?" Really, it's not that big of a deal; anyone who has ever shopped at Costco knows that it is just standard protocol. Silly, perhaps...unnecessary, yes- since they neither permit you to purchase anything without it, nor do they allow you out of the warhehouse without a receipt to confirm your purchase. And for a while, the employees "guarding" the entrance were either casually engaged in something else or just didn't care if you didn't wish to dig through your purse to find your wallet in order to pull out your card and prove your legitimate membership.

So I have only been mildly annoyed by the recent crackdown in card flashing at the Costco until Monday night. Sidenote: It will shock no one that Eli's primary goal in life is to make it through the parking lot-where he knows full well he MUST hold someone's hand- to the sidewalk so that he can then proceed to run away as far and as fast as humanly possible. I don't know why this fact of life sometimes escapes me, but it does. So as soon as we made it to the sidewalk on our way into Costco the other night, Eli was already inside and on his way to visit the wash and the cold, which is to say the washing machines on display and the refrigerated section. So Adam and I both started to rush inside in an attempt to reclaim our fleeing son, paying little attention to the card guard. He seriously stuck is hand out and said, "Excuse me, can I see your card?" After a brief glance of incredulity passed between us, we silently agreed that Adam would chase the kid and I would pacify the guard. "I got it. Can he go get our kid?" I said laughing.

So apparently the card flashing is pretty important. I suppose once Eli busted his way into the Costco, like anything else inside, we needed a membership card to get him out. Makes perfect sense.

PS Am I a bad mother for throwing away all of the art drawings that Eli creates if he tears them to shreds once I display them on the fridge? I was particularly excited about this piece because it rather resembles a Jackson Pollock, don't you think? But this is what he does to every piece of artwork he ever creates; apparently he is not a modern art lover. I try...I really do.

Seriously?

2009-10-09T09:48:00.001-07:00

I guess if Twitter crashed because so many people were telling the dear internet what they thought of President Obama's latest award, I should at least leave a small comment: Well now we know why President Obama didn't get his pet Olympic project for Chicago...because that would have been ridiculously over the top for him to be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize AND the Olympics for his homeboys in less than a week. Apparently the people who make the decisions for this prize didn't see last week's SNL where Obama himself admitted that he hadn't done anything (not to mention anything Nobel Peace Prize worthy) yet-which to be fair, I don't think even the strongest supporters of ending the wars would have expected to be done 10 months into his administration; if he had, it would have been incredibly irresponsible. If there is one thing that SNL does right, it is make fun of people who say and do stupid things. They are incredibly clued in to the sentiments of American people. Had I been asked by the council, I would have strongly suggested they watch this clip before they seriously considered selecting our president to win the award.

E's got Potty Power

2009-09-29T14:38:00.000-07:00

...mostly. Oh man, this job is far less fun than I thought it would be; and I didn't think it was going to be very fun. I will spare the internet the grosser details and pictures of Eli in "unders", as he so lovingly calls them. But suffice it to say, diapers are way underrated. And I say that even as I am forced to admit it is going surprisingly well.

We had a wonderful time in St. George last week. Adam saw the light of day, Eli got to see Adam, I got to be one of two equal parents, and we all got to see Bryan and Natalie, which was a lovely surprise. We went hiking in Zion's, ate at all of the good restaurants Utah has to offer-Pizza Factory and Bajio being my favorites-and generally mowged (a verb derived from Mowgli of the Jungle Book by one of my siblings...probably Chel?)around all weekend by the pool. Adam's parents did their best, as only they can do, to spoil Eli completely rotten which of course we appreciate tremendously. And now we are both back to working hard: Adam at creating teeth accessories and me potty training Eli. Be jealous; it's a wonderful life!

PS Not shockingly, Eli is an excellent rock climber and hiker.

Braggery and a VERY important question

2009-09-21T14:07:00.002-07:00

I don't gush about my husband very often. I try to avoid it where I can. However, I feel compelled to give him a shout out at the culmination of this hellish term. Adam has not really seen the light of day for about three months. The one advantage to that is that he has mostly avoided the 100 degree days-a small consolation for giving up so much vitamin D, I would say. He has been spending most of his days (and nights) locked in a dental lab dungeon, slaving away in the name of achieving a perfect denture, crown or whatever for his patients, often to have them slip out of his hands and irreparably crack in the final moments of the process. (I gave him what I thought was stellar advice: Never polish your projects. Doing so always leads to destruction. Eliminate that last step, settle for good rather than "THE BEST" and come home earlier....he chose not to accept, which is why, dear world, you should trust him with the care of your mouth someday: if he doesn't get it exactly perfect the first time, he will start over and make it perfect.)

So, aside from crashing at about 8:30 pm in the middle of all of the shows we have neglected three nights in a row, he still hasn't taken much of a break on his so called break: On Thursday he played with Eli most of the day in between searching for a cheap replacement (ie, bicycle) mode of transportation for his beloved motorcycle...oh, and trying to repair the lens on the camera that I broke; let's just not talk about that. Friday, he spent most of the day attempting to fix my dryer, WHILE letting Eli "help" him. The poor thirty year old warrior lost its ability to dry with heat last week. Adam, once again locked in a hot, dingy environment spent most of the day taking it apart, absolutely convinced that if he could channel enough time and brainpower into it that he could fix it. This attitude typically proves its usefulness. My dryer is not yet fixed, but a replacement part is on its way so we will see. Saturday, he spent most of the day at a dental conference and being disappointed by the devastating BYU/UTAH losses; let's not talk about that either. Sunday, was church-exhausting on any given Sunday. And today, he is spending on the phone trying to recruit vendors to come to the LLU vendor fair. And tomorrow-this might be the most taxing job of all for him-he has committed to go to Disneyland with us! Bless his heart.

We are going to go down to St. George on Wednesday for a few days. So that should be relaxing and fun. But I appreciate Adam so much. He is a tireless rock; or rather, he rocks.

PS Should Eli be Eli Manning or Billy Idol for Halloween?

Rediscoveries

2009-09-15T14:59:00.000-07:00

I think being pregnant has really brought out the kid in me this time. Although almost everything about it has been more difficult, i.e. completely different, from last time, I have experienced the high that comes from emerging out of places very very low...much like a moody child who can one minute be found bawling and screaming because the world is ending, only to be immediately and completely consoled with a promise to "do the wash,"-or whatever really makes your kid happy. Ok, so I am being dramatic. But here are some of the things that have made me really really happy when I have felt really really bad the last few months:

-DISNEYLAND. I know, I know. Every one of you just decided you don't even know me anymore. But here is the thing: Eli is old enough now to get really excited, really appreciative and really opinionated about what he wants to do. We go and he tells me which rides he wants to go on and, not shockingly, he sprints from one venue to the next. I love watching that. I love spending so much time with him where he is so focused on something other than destroying my house! That is, as long as it is not hot and crowded, which it hasn't been recently.
-CRYSTAL LIGHT SLURPEES FROM 7-11!!! On my way to Disneyland on Friday, I saw a 7-11. And I had this flashback of Lisa Chuntz and I cruising the streets of Provo in search of an acceptable treat-either Crystal Light slurpees or Maverick frozen yogurt. And I had to have one. I thought about it the whole time we were at Disney. I had to stop, even just to check and see if they had one. Lo and behold! My child fell immediately asleep and I slurped on a wild strawberry slurpee while listening to the Red Hot Chili Peppers all the way home. Even though I wanted to puke when I got home, I was so very happy for that hour.
-MAC&CHEESE AND PB&J SANDWICHES. I don't know if it is just that I have grown ultra lazy and would rather partake of Eli's menu than make myself something off of my own for lunch, but have you tried either of these delights lately? Nothing wrong with them. Nothing wrong. Why did I ever think I was too good for these handy little kid foods?
-TV AND FOOTBALL, which are kind of the same thing now that football season has begun; our TV doesn't broadcast much else. I watched the Ohio v USC game by myself on Friday night while Adam went to his 49th Dave Matthews Band concert (not really, but you know what I mean.) I was so happy. Sick, but so happy to be sitting on the couch and watch so much peripheral excitement without actually having to move.
-NAPS. I need one like every other day. Mid afternoon naps cure everything... for a few hours anyway.

Oh bless my heart, those things are kind of sad. I kind of hope my enjoyment of such will wane with the progression of this pregnancy because I sound like kind of a loser.

Farewell old friend

2009-09-09T20:20:00.000-07:00

Oh my gosh, look at that fat baby...Anyway, today we said goodbye to Adam's beloved motorcycle. It was time. But it was sad. We always wanted to ride it together more than we really did, and we both worried about him getting into an accident-even just going to and from school. I think those fears were encouraged by several things: Massive amounts of debt that depend on Adam's functioning appendages to be paid back, a dental student who was critically injured a few weeks ago doing exactly what Adam does (riding home less than a mile during lunch,) and just the general sentiment that now is not the time to be taking any extra amount of risk. For three and a half years, Adam rode that bike to and from school and has loved having it. But it is time to move on. We sold it to a darling newlywed couple who was so excited to have it. But I think Adam felt like he was giving up one of his children...and it was sad.

Round 2

2009-08-31T09:50:00.000-07:00

Due March 21st.

I think most everyone already knows since pregnancy news spreads like wildfire-even across state lines- in Mormon culture. But yeah. Here we go again. We are excited-and when I say we, I mean Adam and I; Eli just says "no baby" when we bring it up. And I don't really know how Duane feels. Chances are he may feel overwhelmed and outnumbered. How is he supposed to fend off TWO kids with red markers?

Getting out of here until football commences

2009-08-26T13:07:00.001-07:00

Eli and I are sojourning to Utah this weekend. I am tired of the heat and tired of being a mostly single parent to my child who is...well, you all know how he is. I am going to get my haircut, swim at the inlaws' new pool, watch baseball games and let Eli play with his cousins and uncles. I made the unfortunate mistake of telling him that we were going a couple of days ago; now he asks me multiple times a day when we are going to Nannie's house to see the wash and Grandma's house to see the goats...my mom has a front load washer which he idolizes, and Adam's parents have neighbors who have goats. He had a full on meltdown yesterday and bawled himself to sleep screaming "Goats!" I keep telling him we'll go on Friday but he doesn't really get it. So that's it. Swimming, goats and laundry-hooray!

PS Football season is almost here. That statement really deserves an exclamation mark but I try to limit them to less than one per post; just know that I am REALLY excited. Go Cougars. Please don't suck.

Eli's WMDs: Aftershave, red sharpies & milk

2009-08-14T13:16:00.000-07:00

My poor house. I sometimes wonder what will be left of it when and if we ever leave here and whether I wouldn't rather just cut my losses now and move into a cardboard box that is not so vulnerable to attack. It's definitely warm enough here.

So while Eli was supposed to be sitting in timeout yesterday for dumping out aftershave all over my nice carpet, he was mischievously carrying out a far more destructive attack. What a fool I am! I fell for the aftershave trick! Such a common war tactic that I walked right into: Create a small bit of destruction to take the attention of the enemy away so that the REAL attack can be carried out. It happens in Iraq all the time. Why should my house be any different?

So I place him firmly, perhaps a little too firmly, on the timeout bench. I proceed to scrape and salvage what aftershave I can off the top of my carpet, you know, because we are poor. And for some reason, aftershave is one of those luxuries that I always forget to buy when Adam is out; so I hate to run out of it. (Don't tell Adam, but I seriously put it back into the bottle.) I then tried to rub the rest of it out. At least it wasn't red aftershave... And now there is just a little part of my bathroom that smells like Adam, which is nice since he has essentially moved into to the dental lab. Good reminder of his presence. So we're good, no big deal.

I walked out prepared to teach my son a lesson about messing with other people's things and how we do not pour out semi liquid substances ANYWHERE in the house (a lesson which, as you will shortly read, he desperately needed to hear.) I had cooled down a bit and I was ready to request an apology, give him a hug, and move on to the rest of our day which included visiting the Ontario Mills mall where the Rainforest Cafe is; he loves to go see the fake animals-and frankly, it is cheaper and easier than the zoo. And I actually love hearing him say, while sobbing in timeout, "I sorry mom!!" So I was ready to do that, smile and get on with it.

Lo and behold, Eli was not sitting on his timeout bench when I emerged from my bedroom. I wasn't necessarily shocked, and the eery silence alerted me that something was definitely amiss. I walked into the kitchen and saw him on the other side of the table with a red sharpie pen. "NOOOOOO!" I screamed only because I saw the potential damage that a red marker could do in the hands of my two year old. Yeah, I totally yelled. He gave me his Calvin and Hobbes smile and ran away from me WITH the red marker in hand. As I sprinted to catch him, I noticed this and this. Yeah. Red freaking marker all over my terracotta tile and white walls.

So while Eli sat in another timeout screaming "Animals? Animals?" I scrubbed my tile with a Scott scrubby and cursed myself for promising an animal trip. At length, the marker came off the tile(so go ahead and turn your kids loose with a red sharpie marker; it's totally fine because it totally scrubs out in a half an hour) and Eli helped me wipe up the soap so I decided we could still go. Mostly because I wanted to walk around in an air conditioned arena and I needed to purchase a wedding gift. We'll have to just paint the wall though.

I didn't laugh at all about this incident until I put Eli in the car to leave and ran back inside to put Duane outside on the patio. Poor Duane and the crap he puts up with to be Eli's friend: Red marker all over his back and face. At that point I was laughing hysterically at the thought of my dog just patiently sitting there while my son red sharpied him. And I haven't quite figured out how to deal with getting that off yet. Actually, it's a really funny reminder of how nutso my child is. So I think I will just leave it and let nature run its course.

And apparently this morning Eli was trying to make up for Duane's now permanent markings by offering him a nice big bowl of milk; and as this story has pretty much run its course, I will just go ahead and let those pictures speak for themselves. I think you get the idea.

Oh no you didn't

2009-08-12T12:26:00.000-07:00

Dear Mr. President:

Did you seriously just tell the starfish story in your latest speech-AND incorrectly attribute it to Ted Kennedy? Uhhh. I'm sorry dude. I gave you a fair shot-a more fair shot than most conservatives in this country. ...and it's not just the fact that you are bailing out every failing industry in the nation with money we don't have, nor just that you are using the power of your immense charm and good spirit to convince people that they want and need something that they don't (government run health care-and I'm on it, thank you. And I don't want it, thank you.) No, it's not just that you seem to encourage and welcome healthy debate while simultaneously ignoring the fact that people are really really legitimately angry about your fiscal and health care policies-both proposed and enacted. Honestly, it's mostly that I just cannot take one more speech with the revolving non-subjects of hope, human spirit, dreams, inspiration and other ethereal non-descript generalities that actually say absolutely nothing instead of the wonderful things that it sounds like you are saying.

I still respect you as our president. I still think you are hot. I still think your wife is hot. But seriously? Cut the crap. The starfish story this morning was the last straw for me.

PS This was the cheesiest picture I could find. Don't you love it?

Several things

2009-08-03T14:18:00.001-07:00

So, on Saturday, Eli and I went down to the beach to see my very oldest, dearest friend Brittanie. Brittanie was my very first friend and I sort of adopted myself into her family because they went out to eat at cool places a lot and were kind enough to take me with them. Eli got to play with Indie in between trying to drown himself in the ocean; she was rather disgusted-as most girls are- by his eagerness to immerse himself, first in nasty water and then in dirty sand. But then they watched Jungle Book together while we enjoyed a hamburger with the whole Wilson family and that was good. I love these people and it was so fun to pretend like I was a kid again with them.

Also, Eli thinks that he is Michael Phelps.

We were at the pool the other day and I asked him if he wanted to jump in all by himself, as I was not planning on getting wet. He looked at me all nervous like, and said in a shaky voice, "Yeah..." I laughed and told him that he didn't have to if he didn't want to. Then, he started to count to three and he just jumped. What a champ. My kid rocks.

Sometimes, it is really hard to keep up with a kid who thinks he is so invincible. But I am pretty sure it will pay off in the long run. And let's be honest- I want tough kids; I am tough, so they have to be tough. We are going to go cliff jumping and snowboarding and motorcycling together and there is no whining about being scared allowed.

Big boy-literally

2009-07-27T20:59:00.000-07:00

Good news: Eli likes "Green Eggs and Ham!" I have been patiently waiting for the day when he would sit with us and read the entire book. And he does! He wants to read it all the time.

Also: I should really count my blessings that this didn't happen earlier, but Eli climbed out of his crib last week. It was actually really funny-since he didn't hurt himself. The house was silent; I had made sure of it to preserve the nap as long as possible. And then I heard, "Knock, knock! Knock, knock mom!" I opened the door and he was standing there with a triumphant smile on his face. I was strangely proud of him. So we took the front side of the crib off that night and he has done surprisingly well with the "big boy bed." Wouldn't you still want to take a nap and go to bed at night if you ran around an average of four hours a day?

Which reminds me: Eli is apparently overweight. At his last doctor's appointment, the doctor told me that he is in the 95th percentile for weight and that his BMI is a 19. Yikes. Does head size figure into total BMI? I told the doctor thank you,
that I am very health conscious, and that I am really not ultra concerned because he RUNS ALL DAY LONG. I actually really appreciated him bringing it up; he said that they are seeing kids having heart attacks at age 19, so there is a huge push to stem off childhood obesity. I think that is great and I appreciate him bringing up a sensitive subject.

PS Don't judge me for going into my kid's room while he was asleep and turning on the light to take a picture; it's a good thing I did. The diaper was off (again.)

I'm sorry to sound like a whiney, self righteous, stay at home mom

2009-07-21T13:06:00.001-07:00

but I have a bone to pick with Parade magazine and anyone else who wants to whine about so called "affordable, quality childcare." Did anyone else read this article on Sunday and feel that this term, or the goal of such, is a complete paradox? The story is that there is a new need in this country to provide, presumably from the government since that seems to be the way of things these days, all star child care that people can afford. Oh, so I, unlike everyone else in America, am one of the lucky few who can "afford" to take care of my child? I don't think so.

You cannot subcontract the care of children and expect that it will be affordable AND high quality. You must choose: Either you stay home with your kids, which involves all sorts of sacrifices and risks for a woman's career and is not at all "affordable;" or you pay dearly for someone who MIGHT teach your kids all of the things that you would in a given day, MIGHT feel sorry for the kid instead of herself while cleaning up poop and throw up, MIGHT like them but probably won't love them the way you do, and MIGHT decide to give up if it is too hard or you aren't paying him or her enough. That sounds risky too.

I think this might be the one industry where the employees have more control over their employers; people who need someone to watch their kids are a dime a dozen. Finding someone who will do it, and do it as well as you would for said dime is a lot harder. I shared my thoughts with Adam and he responded, "Yeah, you know, I really need to find an affordable Ferrari." Affordable Ferraris don't exist because the scope of quality (apparently...I wouldn't in fact know-this is Adam's testimony, not mine) isn't compatible with a low price. Affordable, quality childcare is like seeking an affordable CEO, or healthcare for that matter. They don't exist-correct me if I am wrong, but I will probably be inclined to think you are just fooling yourself.

Frankly, I am kind of insulted by this debate. I understand that there are a lot or people who must work and must place their children in daycare-I am not attacking people who do not have a choice. But for people who DO make the choice, to assume that you shouldn't have to give up on either quality or price for raising your freaking kids!!!! is ignorant, insulting to the people who do make the sacrifice one way or the other, and really really unfair to the children who are the subject of this debate.

Most of you know I have aspirations outside my home and that I struggle sometimes with how badly I still want to go to more school, work a little bit and progress intellectually. So stuff like this that undermines what I do everyday and argues that we should make it a national priority to easily AND cheaply outsource being a mother just bugs the hell out of me. Why, it makes me feel like a Detroit auto worker! Seriously though. I know I am doing the right thing for my children-but it is really hard for me sometimes. I love it. I know it is in their best interest. But it is not something that just comes naturally, easily, affordably or otherwise to me...that is not a pat on my own back; I am just enunciating why this article bugs me.

A few months ago I was at the dental clinic. One of the primary attendants that came to check off my treatment began to make small talk with me, asking me what I do and blah blah. I told her I stay home with my two year old son to which she replied, "Oh that is so lucky that that works out for you to do that. I wish I could." Lucky? Excuse me? Does going into hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt sound like it was just a lucky circumstance? Does giving up my own aspirations for the time being sound lucky? It's not just dumb luck or fortunate happenstance my friend. And it doesn't just work and fit into a neat little box. My husband and I make it work. And it is NOT affordable. So hopefully it is high quality. That remains to be seen. I won't jump right into putting myself in the Ferrari class of mothers. Not yet anyway. Let's be honest, probably not ever.

The one problem with the Grocery Game

2009-07-15T13:40:00.001-07:00

is that I have way too many treats in my house right now: They all go on sale at the same time in some sort of conspiracy, and the Grocery Grandma (that's what Adam so lovingly calls her) puts them on the "list" and tells me which coupon to use...and freak. What am I supposed to do? So, FYI these mixed with these equal fantastic-and I wouldn't really know that unless the Grocery Grandma had told me to buy two packs of M&Ms because they were on sale AND I had a coupon for an additional 1.00 off! Oh, the things you learn. I like to justify it by saying that I need them to teach Eli his colors...he now just asks for a "yewow" or "wed" one and obviously I know what he is talking about-that's how bad it is.

Also, and this has nothing to do with the Grocery Game but is nevertheless an awesome treat: Mix these with cup of this melted with a package of these . Make little cookies balls and freeze them and tell me if you can go a day without eating one. I can't. I totally heart the Grocery Grandma.

Boys

2009-07-08T08:40:00.000-07:00

I will be brief: I do love being one of the boys. I like doing boy things like hiking, cliff jumping, riding motorcycles and what not. I do. But I am not going to lie, after three 8-hour drives with all boys-teenage boys-I have had enough wiener talk, burping, farting and burning things to last me a lifetime. Unfortunately, these things are innate, rather than learned, behaviors. Case and point: Last night as Adam was getting Eli ready for a bath, the kid smirked and said while pointing (correctly, I might add,) "wiener! bum!...ha ha ha!" Seriously, how does he know to think that is funny yet? Adam said it was his proudest moment thus far as a father.

PS Did you know that burping and farting into a canyon that creates an extremely powerful echo NEVER gets old? You would think after three days, it would cease to hold all of the appeal...oh no.

The neglect ends with the end of the excitement

2009-07-07T13:08:00.000-07:00

Is it not true that as your life becomes more interesting and full, your blog does the opposite? We have been non stop partying for the past three weeks. And gratefully, now that Adam's dental boards are over, we are a happy, functioning family again-which is more than a lot of people can say. So I am glad.

We have sojourned from here to St. George, to Provo, to Atlanta, ID (population 45 people), back to Alpine, down to Lake Powell, back up to Alpine and finally back to California. I think I did every fun thing I love to do over this glorious summer break-from sitting in the great wide open sipping on a DDP, to climbing up cliffs by foot and motorcycle and/or jumping off them. Furthermore, my son is now old enough to enjoy not only the things (not necessarily the specific aforementioned-yet,)I do, but the people I love too. He always has a few hard days adjusting to twenty people suddenly wanting to be his best friend. But now that we are back, he is very irritated that I am the only one here- and that I have other things to do besides entertain him fourteen hours a day. These are a few of my favorite things from the trip, and just in general:

alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5355916509096372706" />

"I cute."

2009-06-12T14:27:00.000-07:00

Nothing aggravates me more than when Eli pulls my headbands out of my drawer and stretches them over his fat head...ok, actually that is a lie. A lot of things do. This is just fresh on my mind. Adam and I were finishing dinner last night when Eli ran in with ALL of them stretched over his head and announced, "I cute." Yes, Eli. Yes you are. And then he tried to pull a Jordi La Forge look, which personally, I didn't find nearly as attractive as the rainbow of useless, stretched out headbands.

In addition to being coordinated enough to stretch elastic over his head, he has also demonstrated a propensity for making towers stand far longer than a spectator might imagine. You can tell how proud he is. Maybe he will be an engineer or something.

This was nice:

2009-06-07T20:37:00.000-07:00

Dear Ashley,

I was so sad for you last week when you announced your decision. It was obvious to everyone that your heart was broken. For most of the week, I was angry for you--mad that you had to make a choice that didn't feel right. However, after my indignation passed, I had to admit that you had wise counsel. My own experience was similar to your plans; My husband was in law school while I was in grad school. We hardly saw each other and were financially troubled. It was a rough time for our marriage, and I can't recommend that path to anyone. I can't imagine the added stress of raising a child.

I'm not sure if knowing my experience will help or hinder your healing process, but I thought it was important for someone to acknowledge your sacrifice and tell you that you've made the right decision. Every time we give up something for our family, it feels like a little of our identity dies, right? It might feel like that now, but I promise you that your family will be stronger because of your choice. I hope that knowing that makes this pill easier to swallow. You are an articulate and intelligent woman, and the time will come when those gifts will be used. Don't give up your dreams.

This letter was from a friend of mine, one from whom I would not have expected to receive exactly what I needed to hear. I am still sad. But I am not angry...so that's good.

An Eli post

2009-06-04T13:12:00.000-07:00

These are an old series of pictures that Adam took which I thought most clearly captured Eli's attitude toward...well, mostly just his attitude. I love them because you can just tell exactly what kind of kid he is. They confirm my suspicions that if he knew how to flip me off every time I go to take a picture, he would.

I had also forgotten to post Eli's first, and very hilarious, sentence. Adam recently became concerned that Eli's favorite stuffed animal, a worn out dog that must be washed weekly because my son insists on sucking and chewing on its eyes and face, was a hazard. Specifically, he worried that Eli would crack a tooth (to say nothing of choking) whilst committing this disgusting practice every time he went to bed. So I was compelled to cut the eyes of the beloved dog out. I gave it to him for his nap, eagerly anticipating his reaction to the change. He moved to grab the eyes and direct them to his mouth, at which point his jaw dropped and he exclaimed, "Uh oh! Help! No eyes!"

And then, last night he went to the bathroom on the toilet for the first time. I was clapping for him and telling him how cool that was and he looked up at us and nodded saying, "Nice." I think that is a result of all of the basketball we have been watching; anytime anyone does something cool, and the crowd cheers, a "nice" usually follows from either my or Adam's mouth.

And speaking of basketball and funny comments, I will go ahead and tell you how funny Adam is too: While watching the last two rounds of the semifinals and coveting the shoulders of those by the name of Dwight Howard and Lebron James, Adam confessed that if it were possible to transplant the arms and shoulders of either Dwight Howard or Karl Malone, he would gladly live with a white body and black arms. Go Magic!

The bright side:

2009-05-27T19:57:00.001-07:00

at least now I don't have to give up all of my TV shows.

My heart is broken today

2009-05-25T16:03:00.000-07:00

RIP law school. I am 10% relieved, 90% devastated. I don't expect you to understand. Just be sad for me because I am sad today. Tomorrow will be better, but today I am sad.

weekend and wedding thankimony

2009-05-18T14:17:00.000-07:00

I love weddings for all of the many obvious reasons-the true love talk, the "something fancy", sentimentality and spirituality,the fixing up and getting cute, the pictures-but also because they are generally not very kid friendly. No, actually they are better then NOT kid friendly; weddings demand the appearance of being kid friendly without actually being so. So, you can dress your children all up in adorable, expensive clothes, gawk at them for a few minutes, take pictures, and then send them away. And then, you get to mix and mingle and adore the bride and groom and make them feel awkward and remember your own wedding and how much you really love your spouse. Thank you Cameron and Ashley for getting married; you guys rock, and even though it means I have to share my name, I am so happy that Ashley Jane has joined the rapidly expanding extended Burr family. I would like to thank my adorable, precious little handsome son for so profoundly misbehaving so that we could send him to camp out at Nana's house while we enjoyed ourselves at the wedding festivities; and actually, he did a fine job with his momentary responsibility to look cute for pictures. And I also want to thank my wonderful parents for wanting to have him all weekend. And my sister for taking us to the airport. And my in laws for doing their part in such an excellent and beautiful wedding, and still squeezing in time to spend with us and Eli. And Ben and Wia for letting us stay at their house. And Heather and Shea for being awesome. And Matt for taking an excellent picture of us and Marc for having a cool beard. Weddings just make you love everyone... Good times.

Oh, and Wes for picking us up from the airport and Tamara for watching Duane-I can't believe how many people it took for me to have such a fun weekend! But thank you.

Our coolest tradition

2009-05-13T13:51:00.000-07:00

This was Adam's third straight year of attendance, my and Eli's second. Someone should really plan to come and visit us for this event next year. It was so much fun. We sat on the beach with Brett and Melissa and company and watched the Red Bull air show while our kids entertained themselves with sand, water and goldfish crackers. It is an unbelievable show.

And Chels, I know exactly how jealous you are of this picture.

Pants story part 1: The tale of two pants

2009-05-11T14:08:00.000-07:00

Ok. So I hope everyone enjoyed no pants day to its fullest. Now, as promised, part 1 of the pants saga.

It was January 2007, approximately 2.5 months before Eli's birth. Adam, Chelsea and I traveled to Ecuador to complete Adam's Latin American studies internship, volunteer our "teeth cleaning skills???", have one last adventure, and watch the wife of a small town mayor shamelessly flirt with Adam. (This is the outfit she seriously made me try on in front of like 30 people, probably to humiliate me and show my husband how much comparatively hotter she was. Good times.) Anyway, I think we paid 250.00 round trip for the airfare-which is the entire reason we went; a charity organization had offered the tickets to anyone who would use them before the end of the month. However, we didn't realize until we were at the airport that these tickets were standby tickets for employees of the airline. So, as we were trying to check-in wearing our comfortable sweats for the 14 hour flight, the attendant explained to us that we were supposed to be dressed in business attire. He was telling us that we could not fly, that we were supposed to be accompanied by an employee and "bla bla bla I am a small time employee on a big time ego boosting power trip." It got down to like 20 minutes before our flight was supposed to leave. Chels and I were just kind of sitting there in a nervous panic while my husband politely and diplomatically (something we both know I am not capable of) weaseled our way into a compromise; that compromise turned out to be the greatest source of entertainment for that trip, and really ever since: Adam started to open his suitcase in a quiet flurry. FYI That is how you can tell when Adam is really mad; he gets very quiet and does things really quickly. He pulled out a skirt for me, and told Chelsea to do the same. So we slipped on skirts over our sweats and discreetly pulled off the sweats, no big deal.

Adam, however, and I am seriously still laughing hysterically as I type this, proceeded to shove himself IN HIS SWEATS, MIND YOU, into a second pair of khaki pants. It took a few minutes for him to shove the sweats down into place and button up the overlaying khakis; we all-meaning Chelsea and I and everyone else waiting to check their baggage-just stared in disbelief...and none of these people even knew how much Adam hates pants! He looked up at the attendant with a resigned but indignant look, and demanded our tickets. I don't know if it even would have been possible for him to do anything else besides hand them over after watching Adam put on a second pair of pants right in front of him. So my husband wore two pair of pants. For 14 hours. While sitting on an airplane. It is still the most hilarious thing in the world to hear him complain about it. But, I think he would agree that the trip was well worth the suffering he endured.

And aren't I a good sport for posting this picture? Kind of ironic because it looks like I am the one wearing two (or three, or four...) pairs of pants huh? Lay off, I am like seven months pregnant here. And besides, you can kind of see how cool, and incredibly huge, Quito, Ecuador is.

Before we make a final decision

2009-05-05T14:13:00.001-07:00

about law school, we just had to make sure that I do not want to go to dental school.

And I don't. I'm glad that there are people who do; I'm glad that my husband is one of those people. But I am not.

Eli's birthday books

2009-05-01T10:30:00.001-07:00

Eli wanted to personally thank his Nana and Grandma for the birthday books he received. He thinks that they rock and so far, he has only destroyed one and damaged two; so three out of six are completely intact. Reader, you would be shocked at how many hours a week I spend duct taping, gluing and just generally repairing Eli's books. I should start a rambunctious children's book repair shop. Anyway, I really think books are the best baby shower, birthday and anytime gift that anyone can give to a child. Kids don't grow out of them nearly as fast as they do clothes--and most kids don't destroy them as quickly as mine does. Thank you Nana and Grandma for the wonderful books.

PS This is what happened when I tried to get Eli to look at the camera and smile

Pants story part 2: How I know my husband loves me

2009-04-26T20:18:00.001-07:00

You may be reading the title of my post and wondering to yourself, "Hmm, I don't remember reading a "Pants story part 1" on this blog." Don't worry, you are right. It has not been written yet. I am recounting in reverse order because a recent hilarious incident reminded me of an older hilarious incident; and I believe they both deserve to be shared with the internet.

So any of you who know Adam very well understand that he does not have a great relationship with pants. Or any article of clothing for that matter. Adam probably would have preferred it if that first Adam (of Adam and Eve) had never discovered his nakedness. So being a dentist works for Adam because scrubs are typically rather thin articles of clothing and require no additional layering, which is a serious issue for him. If you spend much time with Adam, you know that his outfit, about 90% of the time, consists of the thinnest material T-shirt, thinnest material shorts and flip flops. And you can guess what he does NOT sleep in.

So imagine my great surprise when Adam woke up one morning wearing a plaid pair of pajama pants. In fact, I distinctly remember being shocked in my sleep when I went to put my cold feet on his usually warm legs and there was fabric there! Of course, I was asleep so I didn't question him then, but we both kind of looked at each other like, "huh?" as soon as he went to get out of bed. Then he began to understand as he vaguely recounted the dream he had had.

For some reason unknown to either of us, Adam found himself without pants and in the presence of people of the opposite gender in his dream. So, bless his heart, he sleepwalked to his closet, got out a pair of pajama pants, made the ultimate sacrifice by putting them on, and went back to bed. That is true love. He put those pants on for me folks. He must truly adore me.

Incidentally, it is the annual no pants day this Friday. Oh, if only. Stay tuned for the pants story part 1.

Ok, now I want to know what you really think

2009-04-21T13:18:00.000-07:00

Thank you for all of your well wishes. It means a lot to me. But now I want advice, criticism, concerns, suggestions, insight, etc. Tell me what you think I should do. And don't say that it is my decision; I know that Adam and I are plenty capable of making this decision together and dealing with whatever consequences either decision would bring. But this is part of studying it out in my heart and mind, if you will. Here are a few of the limited details:
-I would go three nights a week from 6:30-9:20.
-The school is in Ontario, twenty minutes away.
-It's a four year program, including summer terms.
-I have about a 2/3 of the cost scholarship.

Ready, set, go.

Crazy exciting week

2009-04-18T11:30:00.000-07:00

The last 8 days have been filled with firsts for me. So let's start with the first first:
1-Eli and I participated in our first Easter egg hunt last Thursday. I haven't done that since I was a small child. More importantly, Eli ENJOYED an organized activity.
2-We went to the horse races with the Spencers. I had never been before and it was so fun. I had no idea that there were so many intricate details involved in betting, breeding, racing and gambling away your money-there's five bucks I'll never see again.
3-I spoke in Sacrament meeting on Easter. It was the most relaxing Sacrament meeting of my life; I told the bishop that I would be happy to just sit up on the stand whenever he liked.
4-Number four is the real reason for this post so I am going to CAPITALIZE EVERYTHING FOR EMPHASIS AND USE LOTS OF EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!!!!!! TO GET YOUR ATTENTION:
I GOT INTO LAW SCHOOL. AND I GOT A SCHOLARSHIP. OH MY GOSH. If you know me at all, you understand that this has been a dream of mine since before I was born. Not sure what we are going to decide yet but I am very happy, excited, scared and nervous. We would appreciate it if you could all keep us in your prayers while we sort through all of the details and try to decide whether or not I am going to do this.
5-On Monday, I participated in a blood study at the hospital. I sat there for 2 hours while they put three ivs in me and drew blood. And I got 200.00 for it-which unfortunately seems like a lot less money than I thought it did before I knew that I got into law school.
6-
On Tuesday, read the aforementioned post: went to Dancing with the Stars and passed out.

So let's see, just to recap: horse races, got into law school, fainted, went to Dancing with the Stars. Never done any of those things in 25 years; did them all this last week. I wonder what next week holds.

That was so awesome and strange

2009-04-15T09:03:00.000-07:00

I knew that I was going to an episode of DWTS last night; I did NOT know, however, that I would get to be in my own little personal episode of HOUSE. Thank you for all your well wishes; I did wear a darling dress of Ashley's so good call everyone. Oh my gosh people. This has been the strangest anomaly of a very eventful and exciting week; I have had more first time experiences this week than I can ever remember in 25 years of existence. I will explain the rest of what I mean in an upcoming post when I am ready to talk about it-this one is devoted to DWTS. It was utterly delightful until the last ten minutes, which I neither saw nor remember being there for. I didn't know that Steve was the one to go until we were walking out of the studio. I haven't even watched to see if my face was on TV right before I passed out. I thought it was. I thought as what's her face judge was talking that I was honestly going to die on camera. You know on all of the House preludes how they shoot from the patient's perspective and the world like fades away as they slip out of consciousness? That was me. I tried to stand up and applaud and couldn't. I knew there was only ten minutes left and if I could just survive without barfing into my purse or falling over and splitting my head open, I would be fine. Anyway, I would love to see what my face and eyes looked like right at that moment. We sat right behind the judges and had excellent seats to see nasty Carmen Electra do her striptease, RASCAL FLATS play while Chelsea Hightower and that other Utah chick danced with their partners. It was amazing. That was the highlight of the show. The dance floor, and really the entire studio, is so much smaller than you would ever guess. And yeah, let's just say Lil Kim has some amazing anatomy, even if it is fake. And Jewel is flawless in person. So when it was over they had a bunch of EMTs come over and give me Sprite and Mike and Ikes and escort me to the side to take all of my vital signs and crap. Yeah, I was that obnoxious person. It was so unbelievably embarrassing. They made me sign a bunch of release forms and I had to beg them to let me leave on foot. It was comical. This stuff does not happen to me. Anyway, I was and am fine-I just hadn't eaten very much, was wearing a tight girdle to keep, ah hem, things in place, had taken Excedrin for a headache, had been sitting in the lights for 4 hours, and had given blood the day before. So that seems like enough circumstances to make me a little ill. Plus, it made it way more interesting. Marie Osmond and I have now been seen by the same (pretty cute, I might add) EMT. So there you go. We had a blast. Sorry, no cameras or phones were even allowed inside the studio. Ashley took one picture in the car-not very exciting-but I will pirate it from her blog when she posts it.

WAHOO!!

2009-04-13T15:02:00.000-07:00

I get to go to the taping of Dancing with the Stars in LA tomorrow! Does anyone have a fancy cocktail dress that is neither jeans nor white that I can borrow? Yikes-not a thing in my closet meets such description!

I really want to cut my hair like this:

2009-04-09T13:24:00.000-07:00

not the fluffy chick on the right, the hot one on the left. Look, I know I am not going to transform my skin into smooth brown and beautiful, nor will I have hair that slick and pretty, but something has got to happen here; I think pretty much everyone is tired of what Adam so lovingly calls my "whale spout" hairdo:

Happy Birthday little son

2009-04-06T15:33:00.000-07:00

Eli. Dude, it is your birthday. You have made it through two whole years of life. I would congratulate you, but I am actually going to reserve some of the credit for your survival for myself. The other day we were discussing with friends the legitimate reasons-and there are many-why doctors and nurses feel the need to interrogate parents at the urgent care clinic about why they wait to bring their "hurt" children in. I commented that we would be there 3 times a day if I never waited. Enough said about that. I love you E.

I never have been a sappy parent. But your dad went to Louisville for a conference last week so we had several days to spend some quality time together. On the last night before he came home, I walked into your room to check on you-I love doing that because you are so sweet and adorable when you are asleep and I can hold you and cuddle you and pretend that you are being affectionate back...anyway. I tickled your arm for a minute, and waited for you to hold your arm out and implicitly ask for more in your sleep. I love that. Tears started falling down my cheeks, and I realized that you are not a baby, but a boy. And soon (relatively) you will be a man. And soon someone else will love you as much or more as I do. And soon you won't need me for every single little thing, like getting you a cup or milk or turning on Mickmey, cleaning ketchup out of your hair, or following you around the house aimlessly with no other purpose than to let you drag me by the pointer finger.

And I approached sadness...don't get me wrong: I am not bemoaning the fact that you are growing up, or stating the obvious that you "are getting so big!" or wishing for you to be a baby, no no no. I just took a small moment to pause and be grateful for this very short window of time I have to be the absolute, most important, numero uno person in your life. Because it won't last, I know that, and really, I don't want it to. Someday, I want someone else to love you like I love your dad, take care of you the way we take care of each other and I want you to recognize us as those who taught you not only how to do that through our example as parents, but loved you enough to want the same for you. I recognized that my role as your mother is to, first, give you life, second, take care of your basic needs, third, love you unconditionally, and fourth, release you so that you can do the same. It was basic and profound, happy and sad, humbling and exhilarating to realize how important and how fleeting my most demanding responsibilities to you really are.

I adore you Eli. I think you are the coolest and most wonderful boy around. You drive me crazy and test me in more ways than I could have possibly imagined everyday. You teach me about the important things in life and I really hope that I am doing the same for you. Happy happy birthday baby boy-here's to one more year without a "necessary" trip to Urgent Care.

Nana week

2009-03-31T13:48:00.000-07:00

So, those of you who know my mother know that she totally rocks. For myriad reasons. She came for a much needed Nana visit last week and Eli has been asking for her ever since. Unfortunately, I missed out on many of my mother's wonderful traits, such as those of precision and perfectionism; fortunately, I married someone who possesses those that I am missing. Here are a few of the reasons why, in the words of Crush the turtle, she so totally rocks:
1-She is skinny, cute and way too hot to be a Nana. When I go places with her, people always compliment her on "being my sister" or some lame joke like that. But I know we both like it, let's be honest. I hope that I am as healthy and look as good as my mom does when I am a Nana. She always implicitly taught me how important it is to exercise and eat right, not to look good, but to be a healthy and happy mom.
2-Along those same lines, she has more energy to keep up with Eli than I do. SO splitting his requirements makes him a breeze. And she is more than willing to do it, always trying to entertain Eli when I am fed up with the kid and laughing at his eccentricities, making me see how truly funny he is.
3-She is one hell of a bargain shopper. That woman can sniff out a deal from a mile away. We went down to Santee Alley for some serious street shopping. Note: I would not recommend doing this on a Friday afternoon unless you want to spend three and a half hours in traffic on the way back.
4-She is the definition of handy. She can do anything, fix anything, solve anything-and furthermore, she just does it even if you tell her not to: she cut and colored my hair, cut Eli's hair,

scrubbed the disgusting crap off of my stove top (of which I was afraid), fixed Adam's wool pants (which I thought I had ruined), taught me how to make freezer jam (which I thought was hard, but isn't), and refused to let my dishes sit in the sink. And she read "No bad bunnies" to Eli about 100 times and bought him all kinds of birthday presents in between her chores around my house.

5-She goes home to this, and still loves all of the yucky boys in her house anyway!

We did everything there is to do while she was here: visit Disneyland with cousins and aunts,
visit the beach,
eat lots of frozen yogurt and treats, watch our favorite shows, and shop until we no longer wanted to shop. Thank you mom. When you get finished with your laundry, please come back.

It would have been too cruel to take a picture

2009-03-30T08:46:00.000-07:00

while I was trying to get Eli dislodged from Duane's kennel, but make no mistake, I was laughing and wishing I could the whole time. Yes, I know. I am cruel and insensitive...but it was so freaking funny. He tried to climb in there and at some point realized he was far too large-a mighty good lesson, I'd say. That's when I heard the shrill shrieking from the garage. I had to take the kennel apart to get him out. And it took a really long time because I was laughing so hard. Bless the kid's heart. It is not even 9 yet. Usually this sort of incident is an indication of how the rest of the day will go, so I guess bless my heart too.

PS Chel-send me the pictures so I can post about Nana week.

No Bad Bunnies

2009-03-18T14:46:00.000-07:00

Eli got kicked out of nursery on Sunday for biting, which is bad for several reasons:
1-It's bad. We don't bite.
2-We read this book every single night. Right before church, Eli was sitting on my bathroom floor flipping through the pages and saying "BAD!" to the bunnies who were biting, hitting, kicking and throwing their trucks...he KNOWS he is not supposed to bite.
3-He bit two different girls... REALLY adorable and well dressed ones. Is this an omen for what dating my son will be like someday?
4-Everyone in my entire ward knew because Adam went to one of those secret Sunday school classes and could not be found; so they had to bring him through all of the hallways, to the secret catacombs of the primary room to me where he continued to act out and be a complete brat. And then, when Adam went back and sat with him, he did it again.
5-When we ask him if we bite, he says "Yeah! Ha ha!" Oh gosh.

I love this book. The opening line says, "Every little bunny's good, they mostly do the things they should. But sometimes feeling sad or mad can make a little bunny BAD!" (That is Eli's favorite part.) Is my kid just a bad bunny? I know you are all going to say he will grow out of it, but lately I wonder.

Pictures I stole of Dizzyland

2009-03-10T14:01:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure that Adam and I will ever truly convert, but Eli is a promising investigator into the Gospel of Disney...(we believe in giving our kid his own accountability where Disney is concerned, so as not to taint him with our own inherent bias.) But we obviously had fun last week with Adam's family. They left the lovely Newport Villas on Friday with one night to spare. So the Spencers joined us for one more day of play in Newport to send February out with a bang. Much to Ashley's chagrin, we played two games of Settlers...I think the fact that she and I each won a game, denying our husbands a slice of victory made up for the fact that she had to play in the first place. We admired Lamborghinis...I don't know how to spell that, argued about whether or not women are allowed to drive them, ate a fair amount of delicious food, swam with the kids and enjoyed the sun and coastline in all its glory. I'm still feeling guilty about how much fun February was this year.

Favorite Eliisms and their English translations

2009-03-09T14:18:00.000-07:00

"Audee, Audee? Woo Woo?" =Where is Audrey? Where is Lucy? Usually asked when I mention the word Disneyland.
"Ah no." = I don't know. Usually the answer to the aforementioned questions.
"Emmo...yeah. Muck...yeah."= I want you to get me some milk and turn on Elmo so that I can watch Elmo for five minutes (and no more) while I drink my milk.
"Hah hoh?"= Can I have a hot dog...for breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks in between?
"Nack...yeah."= I want a snack so that I can feed it Duane.
"Mo mo! Hah!"= Repeated while chasing Duane around the house with his lawn mower.
"Eat. Yeah." = The two words he says perfectly together.
"Hi D."= Hi Duane.
"Ne Nee. Yay!"=Nursery and/or necklace...great when he is talking about nursery, not so great when he means necklace because it usually ends up broken.

Interesting and unrelated sidenote: I joined the grocery game, got myself a Sunday subscription to the LA TIMES and officially started clipping coupons. I am already a fan for the following reasons:
1-I love reading the Sunday paper, so it was a good excuse to get it for the coupons.
2-This chick's list is amazing. She knows about every sale at your personal grocery store and she tells you exactly what to buy and when to get amazing deals.
3-This system is 100% consistent with food storage ideals.
4-I am in a total grocery rut, buying the exact same things every week. This is helping me branch out, try new things, and substitute items for others because they are on sale.
5-I saved thirty seven bucks at the store today!

One drawback: A lot of the coupons are for frozen food items. I don't usually buy this stuff . But, I am willing to try it if for no other reason than to try it.

I think my husband needs a nap

2009-03-04T13:56:00.000-08:00

or something because he doesn't need a vacation...the whole month of February was one continual party-I'm still waiting for Heather and Ashley to post pictures of us playing at Disneyland and Newport since I didn't take any. Maybe that's it, all that partying. In any case, I went to go let Duane out last night before calling it a night. Adam had just come home, exhausted from a crappy day in the lab and splits with the missionaries. He was collapsed in bed. As I walked by the garage, I heard the fan on my not so quiet car going. Weird, I thought. I opened the door, and the car was running-with the garage closed. Thankfully, no one was in it...although I did momentarily panic and think the absolute worst. SO my husband had parked the car, gotten out of the car, closed up the garage, and turned in for the night while our car went happily humming along. Huh.

We have had visitors, and a glorious week break from E

2009-02-23T20:42:00.001-08:00

So we had the newlyweds in town for Valentine's and such. They kiss a lot. We played a lot of Cataan. I won twice (Wahoo!) and we cooked a lot of delicious food. We made one venture out to the beach in between the episodes of rain. Here are some pics of the lovers, E almost splitting his head open chasing seagulls, E enjoying the barely warm enough to be at the beach, let alone in the ocean, weather, and E destroying someone else's castle:

The greatest part about having your sister come one weekend, and your inlaws come the next is....drum roll: THEY TAKE YOUR KID BACK TO WHERE HE CAME FROM FOR A WEEK!

So we celebrated our anniversary for five days instead of one. It was awesome. We went running together in the morning, out to eat at night, to California Adventure, hiking in Snow Canyon etc. And believe it or not, doing yoga is surprisingly easier without a little person tugging on your extended limb for a cup of milk; warrior three is so much easier to hold when someone isn't trying to push you over. I even went to the temple one day by myself, so that was nice. I didn't really do anything all that different during the day. I just did it a whole lot faster and more efficiently.

Oh E, I missed you greatly though. Our house was so boring and quiet without you. Yes, we did some very fun things and enjoyed ourselves immensely. But after about 48 hours, we wanted you back so that we could listen to you run incessantly up and down our hall in your bare feet. And poor Duane. He just sat there all despondent like all week. So thank you Mom, Chelsea and Natalie for the wonderful break but we are glad to have him back.

And this week we are doing the Disneyfest. Adam's family has set up camp in Newport (the inland empire is way too second rate, so we have to go visit them when they come to visit us...just kidding...kind of) so we are official annual Disney pass holders. Heaven help me. I don't know what everyone has been telling me about the Disneyland "off season." It was crowded today-a rainy Monday in February. And I felt like I was being hoarded into a concentration camp when I was trying to park my car in the Mickey and Friends parking structure. Mickey and Friends my eye. I'm just messing with you, Disneyland. We had fun today. And I am sure we will have fun all year. But mark my word, I refuse to wait in any stupid character lines. Fortunately, Eli has no idea who any of them are yet anyway so I am one step ahead of you.

Satisying your apparent need for pictures

2009-02-09T15:14:00.000-08:00

This is how most of our meals end up: as a hat, as Eli so lovingly calls what is supposed to be dinner.

I'm so thankful to have NOT been born in Ethiopia

2009-02-07T12:25:00.000-08:00

My good neighbor, Larry, asked me to write this article about his foundation; I think it is supposed to be published in one of the local newspapers-please feel free to point out any blatant errors:

One of the greatest benefits of belonging to a community united by a specific religion is just that: unity. Religion can bind people together, driving their purpose(s), creating miracles, and like any smart business, hone in on specific needs of a “market” to provide help for the helpless. The Seventh-day Adventist Church is world renowned for its ability and desire to give help to those in need.

In the process however, as different religions specialize in their own areas, gaps are created. In the market of providing essential medical care, the failure of churches to collaborate with one another can mean death for the citizens found in the gap. On the extremely positive flip side, when parochial organizations work together, countless lives are saved. Dr. Larry Thomas has figured out how to turn the principle of interfaith collaboration into a miraculous life saving machine by implementing such rudimentary tools as clean water and basic medical care for thousands of Ethiopian citizens.

Says Thomas, “Throughout Ethiopia, the only source of water for many families is a contaminated pond or stream. For others, their only source of water is from muddy puddles, aggravated by the dirt-covered hoof prints and feces of many different kinds of animals. Only one in three people in this country has access to safe water. Worse yet is the sobering fact that one Ethiopian child in ten dies before his or her fifth birthday—half of them from diarrhea.”

Moreover, the cultural practices of marrying young pre-pubescent girls to older men create devastating circumstances for childbirth: a physically immature girl attempting to give birth to baby with no trained professionals often leads to the death of the baby, which leads either to death of the mother, or sepsis; in the latter case, the young girls are often sent back to their families and forced into isolation because of their resulting foul odor and “uselessness” for further child bearing. In most cases, a c-section can prevent either dastardly consequence.

With heartbreaking scenarios like these, more than just mission trips, medical professionals and money are needed to save the lives of pregnant mothers and their children. Enter the Catholic Church. Dr. Thomas saw a great need for the constant attention that both nuns and priests in the area could-and were more than willing to-provide. They constantly monitor the basic needs of the members of the mission and, when necessary, direct them to Dr. Thomas’ no cost Gimbie Mission hospital.

So the Catholic church and the Seventh-day Adventist church are now working together, achieving amazing results in far off Ethiopia. And as a result, the partnership has spread all the way back to little Loma Linda. In a recent interview, Dr. Thomas says that a major source of support for his Ethiopian project comes from Loma Linda’s St. Joseph’s Catholic Church on Mountain View Avenue, the city’s only other church besides Seventh-day Adventists. He has made several presentations to the members at the invitation of Father Solomon who gives enthusiastic support for Dr. Thomas’ projects. “We not only have ties with our local Catholic friends,” says Thomas, “but we also partner with the church’s mission near the Gimbie Hospital in Ethiopia.”

Dr. Larry Thomas, who works as an emergency room doctor at the Hemet Valley Medical Center, organized the “Tropical Health Alliance Foundation” _ years ago. On his initial visit to Ethiopia, he quickly saw the need to provide pure water for residents in order to cut down the incidence of disease. For just US $2,500 he is able to construct a cemented area around a spring or stream that provides water for an entire village. He says that more than _____villages are now benefiting from his project.

Dr. Thomas first came up with his program when he was a post-graduate student in London’s School of Tropical Medicine. After his graduation in medicine at Loma Linda University School of Medicine, class of 1974, he decided to take this special post-graduate course. Part of his graduate work was a field trip to a needy place in Africa; he chose a Seventh-day Adventist rural medical facility in western Ethiopia. Over a period of___years he has been able to provide funding for European physicians attending the school in London to spend anywhere from a month to three months helping the medical needs of this small ___ bed hospital, thus providing a steady stream of care, making procedures like c-sections possible, preventing death or like unto it. The Catholic Church provides the managerial help, directing patients to the clinic and Dr. Thomas orchestrates the medical aide.

As a devout Seventh-day Adventist, Thomas is an excellent representative of his church. His paramount priority, however, is interfaith collaboration. The best take home message is not just the nice idea of a religiously motivated organization saving lives, but rather, that religions are working together, both here and abroad, to prevent easily preventable death. Says Thomas, “Parochialism kills people, collaboration saves lives!!!!!”

Some good quotes

2009-02-03T09:02:00.001-08:00

Last week I went down to Thousand Oaks and watched my aunt Stephanie's four darling girls. Had I not had Eli, it would have been a luxurious, enjoyable relaxacation. The girls are all very neat, tidy, disciplined, and well mannered which naturally inclined them to be greatly disturbed by my son's behavior:

The first day, cute little wise beyond her two years Caroline stared with disbelief as Eli doused himself in ketchup, managed to throw yogurt, and dump the undesirable food on the floor. The look on her face was of extreme disdain. I watched, smiling, as she tried to work out in her head how this was possible. And then she turned to me and said, "He is so dirty. We need to clean him up," as she hopped down from her perfectly clean chair and began to pick up the discarded hot hogs and juiced grapes. She is two.

Later that night as Eli moved efficiently from water cooler, creating a small pond in the kitchen, to entertainment center, disabling the TV audio, to washer and dryer, to bathroom toilet for more water games, to computer in the guest room, Sydney served willingly as my disaster cleanup specialist and looked at me imploring, "Is he always like this?"

They all took it upon themselves to inform me when he was pushing buttons on the dryer and climbing on the couch or stunk-which, frankly, in light of the circumstances, I was ok with...until some random man came knocking on the garage door asking if this baby in a stinky diaper who was wandering out in the neighborhood was mine. What do you say to that? Apparently he was not harmlessly pushing buttons in the laundry room which annexes to the garage...

Ok, one last good one. While bathing Eli, my faithful little companion Caroline remarked "He has a funny bum." Yes, Caroline. All boys do.

PS I am so happy that my brother and sister and brother in law are alive. They got in a horrible accident on I15 on Saturday. They aren't smart enough to go to the hospital to make sure that everything is all right, but so far so good. So anyway. Drive safely everyone because this can happen so easily.

Poor form America

2009-01-20T08:33:00.000-08:00

Booing the outgoing President? Honestly.

hot hogs

2009-01-18T13:06:00.001-08:00

Until about yesterday, Eli employed roughly a 3 word vocabulary: no, more, and Duane.
Now, all of the sudden, he talks. We are having a blast. After months of pleading with him to say "please" and receiving a vehement "no!" in return, he looked at me all triumphant like and yelled "peeease!" I have never been so proud. I taught him that-he learned something I taught him! The last two days have been my finest as a parent. He called a hot dog a "hot hog" today, which makes a surprising amount of sense. I am calling them hot hogs from now on.

I didn't win

2009-01-15T16:43:00.000-08:00

But that's ok. Now I won't feel guilty about my new birthday jeans. And PS, I really do like Dr. Pepper Lip Smackers too, Melissa.

I hope I win...

2009-01-14T14:31:00.000-08:00

I entered a contest in November with this little missive; the prize is a makeover. Actually, I will feel a little bit sheepish if I do win since I was so generously Christmas and birthday gifted with things that mitigate the following issues:

REASONS I (DESPERATELY) DO NOT (NEED) A MAKEOVER

Every woman needs a makeover every now and then…except for me. I am totally set. My husband’s one hundred thousand dollar a year dental school debt, er, budget allowance, makes plenty of provision for me to wash my hair once a week and occasionally cut my toe nails. So don’t worry about me. You should give it to someone else.

Really, I get my hair cut regularly. Every year. I know a lot of prissy people recommend a nice cut and color every two or three months. But I like dark roots; I prefer them, actually. I think the contrast of dark roots with blond ends helps draw attention away from my shoes that I bought when I was in high school, which are seriously super hip. I was like the most well dressed girl ever when I was sixteen, so those shoes totally give me a boost if I am ever having an “I hate being poor while accumulating asinine amounts of debt” days.

And clothes, yeah. I have so many cute clothes. Especially since I moved here from Utah, where it actually gets cold. I love having to wear the same T-shirt and shorts every single day for ten months out of the year. Oh, and I got another T-shirt on clearance at Target a couple months ago-seriously-BEST. DAY. EVER. Oh my gosh, that three dollar baby did so much for my tired, struggling ten year old wardrobe.

So makeup is good too. I bought like a lifetime of supply of Wet n Wild makeup back in the seventh grade…love it! I mean, really what more could a girl ask for besides mismatched foundation and white eyeliner? Oh, and I have TONS of LipSmackers too. In like EVERY flavor. I think Strawberry kiwi is my favorite. And I love to wear A LOT of makeup, like cake it on really good so that is obvious that I am wearing it. I do that a lot.

Besides that, sometimes I buy razors from the 99.99 cent store to shave my legs. I got a pedicure once before I got married and that was like the most awesome thing ever, almost as good as the day I got that three dollar shirt at Target. Oh, and my very favorite thing? Headbands and crusty gel covered “naturally” curled hair to hide the fact that it’s been a while since my last cut and color; it’s my nod to Jessica Spano from Saved by the bell. She was the best.

So please, do NOT waste this makeover gift on me. I am totally good. In fact, I daresay I look freaking awesome with my brown roots, split ends, chap stick and ten year old jeans. Find someone who really needs it.

Sincerely,

Ashley Burr

See for yourself

2009-01-07T13:30:00.000-08:00

Christmas break pictures. No words. My mind is occupied right now.

Eli the unicorn

2009-01-05T13:18:00.000-08:00

Seriously, is this kid going to make it into adulthood? I swear these are not my fault. I am no longer hoping that he will make it through childhood without permanent scars-the scars will obviously be there. I now just hope that he will survive himself.

For a more pleasant view of Eli-and I swear I don't know how she did this because he was crying and falling and freezing in the snow-go here to see our family pictures that Adam so graciously arranged for my birthday present. It was the most thoughtful gift I have received in a very long time and I appreciate it greatly. Especially since I now have something with which to replace the mystery picture above my fireplace.

Eli discovered gum today

2008-12-17T13:21:00.000-08:00

I did not intend to highlight magnificent dental products two posts in a row; I also didn't intend for this week of blog posts to be a study in Eli's misbehaviors. Fortunately for him, he is not old enough to be accountable to Santa yet. I was doing laundry and started hearing Eli saying "Mmmhh!" in his room. I walked in, and found him sitting on the floor along with all of the contents of my diaper bag, which I am still trying to figure out how he got down from a very tall bar stool in my kitchen. He had emptied the last four pieces of gum out of the box and bitten off the top half of all four pieces, wrapper and all. Good thing it was Trident Xtra Care: if he happened to chew it at all before he swallowed it, the stuff is excellent for your teeth; if not, they are relatively small pieces and I am sure the wrapper contains fiber.